A friend from Down Under sent us a couple of ads for firm kwp!, which, perhaps frustrated with the self-entitled glamazons who came a-knocking for ground-floor opportunities, decided to take a more, uh, straightforward approach.
This classified, for instance, spouts, "Help make ads. And coffee too."
To the left: "If you think this job is crap, wait 'til you see the pay." This version quickly ends, "Apply now, because chances are no-one else will."
Nice, kwp!. No one can say you didn't warn them.
Playing gofer does wonders for your ambition. Having had to fetch our fair shares of coffee and muffins, every new day only made us hungrier for the moment we could send our own interns' asses all over town for the one chocolate croissant left in a 30-mile radius at 2:30 in the afternoon.
Nothing makes a pastry taste better than the sweet smell of fear.
We might have a lead on where all those old Facebookers are suddenly coming from. Advertising Age reports that marketers, sensing the hype, are joining the Facebook bandwagon in droves.
These include Julie Roehm, who calls Facebook "a terrific networking site that has a social bent, which makes it more fun than businesslike."
Roehm is using the service to connect with "young family members" according to Facebook, while other marketing gurus are taking advantage of said "social bent" to demonstrate that they too have personalities - joining political parties, posting vids and sharing useless information in real-time via the status feature.
Ad Age's Steve Rubel, for example, is "enjoying a light frappucino."
We played with the thought of trashing all these people but unfortunately we're on it too, and practically log on compulsively to see if anyone has SuperPoked us in the last 8-10 minutes.
Witness here the unnecessary loss of a whole minute.
Duller than dishwater, man. Put together for P&G by Leo Burnett, Puerto Rico.
Shake Well Before Use writer Ariel Waldman, living up to the technology, advertising and, most importantly, sex aspects of her site's tagline, brings us this QSOL server ad that's got everyone's panties and jockstraps in a twist. With the headline "Don't feel bad, our servers won't go down on you either" not so subtly placed next to an image of a woman's face with giant red lips (like we haven't seen that image anywhere before) who looks like she might actually be ready to, this ad conjures every bad stereotype out there regarding geeks, their technology and their seeming inability to get any.
It's even got feministas all a twitter ("The misogyny is obvious, since the ad treats women explicitly and entirely like sexual objects."). But the best thing about this tempest in a Donny Deutsch Speedo is the comment from Sarah MC who wrote, "Sometimes I really feel for men. They buy a product (women), expecting it to work like it's supposed to (sexual slave), and it malfunctions! There really is no justice." Indeed.
There's really no reason or us all to get turgidly heated over this becasue a simple re-write of the headline will make this all go away: "Don't feel bad, our ad won't sell any servers either."
Almost one year late, Coors and its agency, DraftFCB (we're sure George Parker will have comment on this), are attempting to create a Coors Light spot using last falls press conference outburst from then Arizona Head Coach Dennis Green. During the outburst, following a loss to the Chicago Bears after a 20-0 lead, Green screamed "If you want to crown them, crown their asses. They are what we thought they were and we let 'em off the hook!" After which, he walked away from the podium.
Apparently, Coors and DraftFCB are having a tough time coming up with something. Meanwhile, it's all over YouTube including endless spoofs, some of which are probably better than anything DraftFCB will come up with.
A new company called Free Hand Ads proposes putting brand names across the top margin of college-ruled pieces of paper. Paper with ads printed on them are free to students.
Per a quick conversation with the founders at ad:tech Chicago, the idea hasn't been banned or even much frowned-upon by either high schools or students.
So in the last couple years left of paper-shuffling in schools, you might as well get your brand name into the hands of some penny-scrimping students.
And while you're at it, you might as well hit college bluebooks, too.
Alex Tew's Million Dollar Homepage has spawned another copycat. A boy named Graham (at left) has launched Million Dollar Wiki, an opportunity to own a completely customizable page for a mere $100 a pop.
So far we've found pages for buying a blogger, Fender guitars and letters to businesses. We can't believe this guy has already sold almost 300 pages. Guess we'll see if lightning can strike twice and the million dollar idea makes another millionaire out of another earnest kid.
To suggest what fragile harmony can exist between man and nature, Proof Fine Furnishing sent us a couple of prints created by Leo Burnett, Singapore.
The tagline quietly reads, "Naturally attractive." You probably can't see it very well but the vase at left is actually composed of butterflies, which you can see more clearly if you zoom in on the PDF version.
We dig the elegance and attention to detail to the pieces, which demand a long look. These kinds of ads, in which you have to do the pursuing, are an undervalued commodity in an environment littered with competing messages.
Check out a lamp stand made of moths here.
Video game publisher 2K Sports has pulled digital firm EVB into its ranks to build a lifestyle marketing campaign called Football Resurrected.
A big plug for All-Pro Football 2K8, the virtual game boasts 300 pigskin "legends" including Jerry Rice and Barry Sanders, as well as a few familiar faces of underground hip-hop, including Hieroglyphics, Jurassic 5, Pep Love and even Rakim.
The site is pretty cool and the raps, which revolve entirely around "the resurrection of 2K Sports," are damn sound. It's all really clever and whatnot.
If the musical icons from our beat-banging youth aren't going to rap about their shoes or how cool they are or how lame haters can be or how love pounds you into submission, they might as well be rapping about football.
We're all just trying to get paid at the end of the day, right? Right.
Our dirty-minded friend Freud once said a cigar is just a cigar. But there's something deliciously perverse about the outdoor ads for Camel's new menthol Wides, which are "big fat delicious."
For some, it may be all too tempting to set a new Wide between their lips and...
Blow some smoke?
Light that fire?
There's no way this can end nicely.