Rule of Thumb: Before Molesting Strangers with Nipple Tassles, Be Famous.
Berlin agency Aimaq Rapp Stolle promotes HEAD's new "Speed" racquet with a little extra-extra action from Serbian tennis star Novak Djokovic. Apparently Speed makes him so virile that he manages to run into the aisle and spit game at a blonde before the ball even returns to him.
But "spit game" is an understatement; the guy busts out with balloon animals (which would've been enough to impress us), boy band moves, nipple tassles, and seals (both animal and Navy).
Also, there was some grandma-on-Djokovic baby oil action that made us feel mildly uncomfortable, but hey, when you make over six figures for knocking balls across nets (or into them, as the case may be), normal rules -- such as the knee-jerk compulsion for a restraining order -- do not apply to you.
Eventually the blonde gets Djokovic to get back to work. Verdict's still out though on whether he gets the girl. But hey, if dude turned you on, why not watch this video of him doing impressions of other tennis pros?
Classy shit, seeded for your viewing pleasure by the fine folks of Feed.