Bonds Underwear Slams Ball Into Center Pocket

We know there are a lot of soccer...uh...football stars out there who can manipulate the ball in ways you never thought a ball could be manipulated but we haven't yet seen a manipulator who can get all the balls in one pocket all at the same time. What we really want to know is: did that hurt?

There's always a new way to sell underwear, isn't there?

Bill O'Reilly Mashed Up, Hood Ornaments Hunted, Mad Men Twitterati Reinstated

- "Fuck it! We'll do it live! Fucking thing sucks!" You tell 'em, Bill, you wild animal you.

- The hood ornament is an endangered species. Is this what people want? We can save pandas but not the Spirit of Ecstasy?!

- New Shepard Fairey exhibition in SF: "Duality of Humanity." Inspired by Joker, the peace-sign-sporting Vietnam soldier in Full Metal Jacket, the show mashes up conflicting symbols of violence and peace. The project also has a strong Red-propaganda-meets-mass-media feel. Tasty.

- It's Bible stories! And Legos! Suddenly Sunday's looking like a party.

- With a nudge from those rascals at Deep Focus, AMC decides the Mad Men Twitter characters -- which it was so quick to boot -- are okay after all.

- Pepsi apparently did a better job of associating itself with the Olympics than Coke did. And it probably spent a helluva lot less money.

'Welcome to Harlemshire! I Want the Gangsters Up from 82nd St. Right Here.'

Yell.com, an online service from the Yellow Pages, debuted its first standalone TV campaign this month. The effort revolves around a party planner called Fresno and his whiny little clients, which vibe like rejects from My Super Sweet Sixteen.

This spot went live on August 20. It's about Marcus, a Surrey brat who wants his Roman-themed party changed, practically overnight, to a bling-heavy gangsta-gansta street bash. Fresno, aiming ever to please, insists all this and more can be accomplished at the drop of a (pimptastic!) hat. Meanwhilst, his anxious assistant trots behind him, tapping queries into Yell.com at a feverish pace.

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Nokia: Yes! Follow the Strangers with the Soothing Shirts

This Nokia campaign, where a Personal Navigator leads the lost to their final destinations, probably wasn't meant to encourage emo-stricken weirdos to trust friendly strangers. But from here on out, if I ever want to kidnap a giant chicken in dire straits, I'll probably pull on a "Personal Navigator" shirt and try taking it by the hand.

Also see bickering pirates locate misplaced X, a lost alien get alienated, two goths find love, and -- my favourite -- Pacman outrunning the ghosts, which also have a Personal Navigator.

The campaign was seeded across the 'net by Unruly Media. Its happy task is to endear the Nokia N78 -- featuring maps! -- to the navigationally-challenged. The music gave each piece a Chaplinesque feel, which made things seem that much sadder when it all went horribly wrong.

Come On, Big Boy. Pick Up that Magnum and Blow Holes Through Republik.

Bowing to its slogan, "Change or die," North Carolina-based agency The Republik is inviting users to shoot the living crap out of its old website.

Choose from a 44 Magnum, a shotgun or a sniper rifle. The Magnum is by far the most satisfying, and after about 10 hits, a fancy new Republik site appears. It's got a lot going on. Existing projects float across a galaxy of polka-dots, and the top nav is vaguely reminiscent of Modernista, except without all the distractions.

When clicked, a floating dot labeled "don't click here" brings users to an alarmingly red self-promo page. Not a bad gimmick, but gimmicky all the same.

If I had the cash and a cause, would I tap The Republik by merit of its site? At the very least, I'd want to hear them out. I could be wrong, but I think they get it.

Jawbone Ad Highlights 'Beauty' of Transgender Plastic Surgery

The freakish looking transgenger queen Amanda Lepore -- who had her first cosmetic surgery at age 15, decided to have a sex change in high school, led a failed suburban housewife life and then hit New York for fame and fortune -- appeared in a Jawbone ad in this week's New Yorker.

Having already fronted M.A.C., Armani, MTV, and Swatch campaigns, Lepore appears in one half of a spread. The other half features what appears to be a plastic surgeon with a somewhat dumbfounded look on his face, possibly in reaction to the overly "worked-on" Lepore.

One always aims to be a bit eye-catching in advertising. This ad certainly accomplishes that.

Can't Find a Job? ANPE's Not Convinced

ANPE, the National Agency for Employment in France, tapped TBWA\Corporate to preach its gospel to disheartened work force rejects. What TBWA came up with is respectful of ANPE's traditionally risk-averse style, but also playful in a Where's Waldo? sorta way.

The prints are detail-rich and do a nice job of connecting the online world, which is big but can seem solitary, with the bustling offline world. The ad at left features a city intersection flooded with people. It reads, "700,000 CVs online to find your next business partner."

See variants:

o 300,000 offers online everyday to locate your future office.
o 400,000 people log on anpe.fr everyday to save time.

What fun. It would be great to see these, larger than life, in a Metro somewhere.

Photogasmic Diesel Commercial Makes Fantasy A Reality

It's well know Diesel does some weird/interesting/racy/bad advertising. They did that global warming thing. They did that two-hotties-in-a-room-S&M thing. They did that Aarif Smaks dance instructor thing. Now Diesel offers up some photogasmic "fuel for life" for, well, its Fuel for Life line of fragrance for women.

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Pet Butler Van Sports Wishful Thinking on the Rear

To better leverage the company van, Pet Butler's marketing director built a pair of eye-catching rear-end displays -- one with a dog reading on the toilet (tagline: "Until then, call us"), and one with a giant glob of poop steaming on an astroturf lawn ("Friends don't let friends scoop poop!").

The industrious MD says he catches people snapping pictures of the displays all the time.

Kentucky-based Pet Butler shovels and sanitizes doggy doo so clients won't have to. Funny service, but I guess it's in demand: it now serves over 1500 cities. (They probably don't do babies, but I'll bet that's an expansion option. Check out the website for more amusing imagery, cheesy puns and even some Pet Butler radio.

Levi's Unbuttons Fresh Musicians, Fringe Celebs

"Everyone has something to reveal. They just need to be unbuttoned," Levi's croons, crowning its "Unbuttoned" campaign for the classic 501 jeans with "spoonfuls of soul and swagger" (I just love that line). On personal subsites, three artists -- Estelle, Nikka Costa and Wale -- describe why they became musicians and pass on a free track for users to download.

Each MP3 has a different sound, but they all feel big and breezy. (Slightly off-topic, isn't it nice to see so many companies share downloadable ear candy? It's like trick-or-treating, except with iTunes instead of a pillowcase.)

Music isn't all Levi's is baring. Other celebs with something to share include the adorable Jamie Bestwick, who's giving away a free BMX video, and there's a Perez Hilton giveaway coming in September. (They gave us the link, but it's still doorknob-dead.) What Perez is giving away I'm sure I don't know, considering his two cents always come free.