So...that's really all there is to say about this Canadian commercial from Idle Free Calgary.
Well, wait. Maybe we do have a thing or two to say about it. First off, who the hell even thinks up a cause groups for this sort of thing? People have way too much time on their hands.
Second, the analogy is all wrong. Pissing on the planet is actually a good thing. It makes the grass grow. It's a fertilizer. It's not pollution akin to leaving your car idling for no reason. The logic is completely flawed here.
Want to see the world's worst parody? Actually, really, you don't. It will totally ruin your fond memories brought on by the wittyliciousness of Old Spice's I'm on a Horse. So please. Don't watch this horrific homage in which Dalla Maverisks' Caron Butler fails miserable at impersonating Isaiah Mustafa in the stupidest knock off you will ever see in your advertising life.
Please make it stop. Geico tried it with the caveman dude and it failed miserably. Is there any reason to believe a movie about the E*Trade babies won't equally suck? The babies are (occasionally) funny because they are a gag. And a tired one at that. It's like Saturday Night Live turning a skit into a movie. Most fail.
Of course, we'd love for Lindsay Lohan to make an appearance halfway through the flick and wreak havoc when Lindsay the milkaholic pops in. Now that would make the movie worth watching.
Why are we writing about this crap? Why do we ever write about this crap? Banned ad! Woo hoo! Look at our banned ad! It's so controversial, It's so offensive.
"Bookmaker Paddy Power's latest commercial has fallen foul of regulators who fear it likely to cause widespread offense. The advert - depicts four wheelchair bound actors 'doing a runner' on their bill from a curry house. One of the actors wears a branded Hearts & Balls rugby shirt, to raise the profile of a rugby-based charity that helps players who have been impacted by catastrophic injury."
It shouldn't be banned because it's offensive. It should be banned becasue it is horrifically uncreative and ridiculously stupid.
Want to know how cheap and slimy some marketers can be? Look no further than Panties.com. The online purveyor of panties, thongs and other lingerie ripped of one of its affiliates.
In a recent campaign, Panties.com stated, "We are so confident you'll make a sale that we'll pay you $50 if you put one of our new panties.com banners on your website and do not make a sale by February 28th!"
Eric Nagel took them up on their offer. But, as he explains on his blog, at the last minute, Panties.com Program Manager Lila swooped in and made a purchase negating the $50 bonus netting Nagel the usual cut which, in this case, was $7.50.
In a morbid bid to capitalize on the SeaWorld tragedy, the World Society for Protection of Animals has hired Work Club to create a new campaign to dissuade British tourists from patronizing "cruel" attractions while on vacation. In other words, don't go to SeaWorld.
"Our aim is to reduce the economic viability of tourist attractions that rely on animal cruelty to generate revenue from British tourists," said WSPA UK's Director, Suzi Morris.
All well and good but your timing is a bit questionable, Suzi.
She's cute and she's young but she's mostly wrong. Not that it matters that she's cute or young. But she's still mostly wrong. Of course a creative brief should be brief, concise and not an attempt to share the entire strategic plan or be misused as a CYA document. But when Rapp Worldwide Senior Copywriter Lauren Warner tells us a creative brief should be written as if we were speaking to a kindergartner, well, that's just stupid.
Yes, we need to avoid throwing the kitchen sink into it. It needs to offer insight. It needs to distinguish the brand from another. It needs to form basis for the development of a great idea. But to argue the brief should be oversimplified to the point it leaves out important information (um, demographics, competitive information), that it should be "fun" and that it should be akin to something like "short sentences + action verbs = happy creative team" makes all creatives sound like a bunch of whining twentysomethings. Oh wait.
Seriously? Seriously, Lauren? Do you really think creatives should be spoken to as if they were five-year-olds who can't interpret anything more complex than a Dick and Jane book? Seriously?
I've always had a simple solution when it comes to dealing with people who complain about process and it's simple: do your fucking job.
Seriously? You go to ad school. You drop out (lazy? flunked? too expensive?) to finish your books on your own. When you can't, you ask the ad industry to crowdsource it for you. What happened to good old fashioned hard work? Oh right, laziness reigns supreme these days. Can't cut it on your own? Open it up to the internets and surely someone else will cover your ass by doing your work for you.
Why are Eric Stiles and Nick Larson doing this? To challenge the current portfolio school system, they claim. Granted, the schools aren't perfect but if you two want to succeed in this business, you might just want to do some of your own work. Oh wait, we're all a bunch of lazy-ass delegators in this business so you'll both fit in perfectly.
We've sat through our fair share of meetings, helplessly observing the birth of what would, sadly, become...A REALLY BAD IDEA. Oh, we'd do what we could to get things back on track but, as everyone in this business knows, the client, no matter how smart or how stupid they are, almost always gets their way. And if they don't, some pompous creative director does.
We'd really love to have been in the concepting meeting for what resulted in the disaster known as the Toyota Avalon Singers. If only to witness the absurd platitudes which must have been uttered during the creation of this embarrassment.
Seriously? Seriously? Are we actually writing about this? Are we actually going to give GoDaddy's Bob Parson's the time of day for yet another "banned" Super bowl commercial stunt? Oops. We just did. Dammit.
"Of the five commercial concepts we submitted for approval this year, this NEVER would've been my pick for the one that would not be approved," said Go Daddy CEO and Founder Bob Parsons. "This is about a guy who starts an online business and hits the jackpot. I just don't think "Lola" is offensive, in fact we didn't see this one coming -- we were absolutely blindsided!"
Oh the horror, Bob! The shock! The dismay! The utter incredulity of it al!
Make it stop.