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Is There a Heaven for iPods? ... No. This is sort of neat. Watch the sped-up drama of your consumption patterns on The Story of Stuff. Very rarely have we been able to sit still for 20 minutes to listen to something educational. Maybe it's narrator Annie Leonard's exciting grade school reading voice ... or the animated stick figures. Anyway, this is useful information to know if you're an avid consumer of All Things Hype and Now. Everybody with an iPod -- listen up! Volvo Goes Webisode Way, and ... Ew. Make the Logo Bigger just introduced us to Mr. Robinson's Driving School, an online webisode campaign for Volvo that somehow bombs harder (and more expensively?) than when Tide did it. We would rather watch Charlie Bit Me! 9.8 million times than sit through this working class wannabe-Isaac-Hayes crap even once. Screw the Drama. It's Dance-Off Time! Dance2DC is a new game by Shift Control for Barely Political. (Visit the site to play it and/or watch the video that inspired the madness.) We don't know much about it aside from that Hillary is a disco fever inferno and Edwards channels John Travolta. Then it hit us: wouldn't life be better if we banished ballots and decided everything with sudden death dance-offs? You can fake a smile, but you can't fake the funk. MySpace Head Doctors Invest Blogging with Holistic Properties A report from Melbourne's Swinburne University of Technology finds bloggers are less isolated, more connected to a community and more satisfied with friendships. (Dude. That's because, if not for blogging, we would have no friends.) The study was conducted on MySpace (WTF?). 134 MySpace users completed a questionnaire from the researchers -- likely bulletin-spamming all their friends in the process -- with 84 intending to blog and 50 not blogging. Domino's Pizza Gets All CGM/Web 2.0/Social Media-ish Havas' BLM Quantum has unleashed a make-your-own-video (remember when we had simpler names for things?) contest on MySpace in the United Kingdom called Think Outside the Box which urges people to "get green" and recycle their pizza boxes into ingenious new uses. Have at it CGM (oops, we mean make-your-own-video) fans. Ripped Porn Star Buffs Up Bluelithium Founder Gurbaksh Chahal We've written about ad network company Blulithium and its founder Gurbaksh Chahal several times before but we never thought we'd be telling you, according to ValleyWag, he's been buffing up his body by training with San Jose-based bodybuilder Tom Austin, star of several gay porn flicks such as Minute Man 24. But it all makes sense. You can't be a porn star unless you have a six pack, bulging chest, massive biceps and a bulging package to go along with all that super human manliness. Austin has all that. So it's just logical Austin would know how to buff up Chahal who has acting aspirations of his own. As Predicted, Firebrand Flames Out Less than five months after its launch, Firebrand, the all-ads-all-the-time cable channel and online site is, as we predicted from the start, closing operations. Investor's from NBC Universal to Microsoft to GE have pulled the plug and will no longer fund Firebrand and its ill-conceived belief people actually want to seek out and watch advertising as a form of content on equal footing with network programming or movies. For Hardcore Green, Revisit Penguin Basics To persuade people to Do the Green Thing, Play With Us put together this documentary about penguins in Antarctica. Except the penguins aren't penguins; they're naked people that seem at least partially catatonic. All this to get us to huddle? We've seen cozier arguments. Lightning Bolt Terrorizes, Body Spray Saves the Day Check out this crazy Dove viral based on Japanese puppet theatre. It reminded us of that scene in Funny Face where Audrey dons black garb and does interpretive dance at the existentialist bar. Except imagine the protagonist is Ugly Betty, and body odor -- not materialism -- is the source of the world's problems. Put together by Ogilvy Brazil for Dove Invisible Dry. Online Cult of Oprah Guides Users to the Light We never cease to be amazed by Oprah's power and pervasiveness in the culture. She can hang out with liars and just generally unpleasant people and still come out of the association reeking of rosebuds. And she's probably the only woman in the world who can get away with putting her own face on her own magazine every month without looking like a narcissist or a dictator. Do you get how amazing that is? Anyway, Oprah has launched a 10-week class to promote a book called A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purposes. The class is entirely online and free to take. The first session, which went down last night, pulled in over 700,000 fawning Oprahlytes hungry for "East-West-hybrid mysticism." Future sessions will take place every Monday. Homegirl could brand a Bible and change every third word to "chewbacca" and she'd still come out of it making more money than Easter Island. 
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