Okay. Anybody douchey enough to rip the premise to Patrick Suskind's Perfume, with penguins, and pass the idea off as "uncharted territory" (they SAID this! We SWEAR!), should be chained to a wall, completely naked, and shaved once weekly until the end of time.
Insult to injury, the supposed YouTube debate that the video triggered is completely contrived and thrown-together by a bunch of people who either joined on the same day or don't have profiles.
We're actually scandalized. This is one of those "I CALL SHENANIGANS", like, from-the-rooftops! moments.
Oh yeah, the video is called Penguin Love and it's for Columbia Sportswear.
So we're guessing this is going to be like The Pussycat Dolls but in movie form. As part of its promotion for the movie How She Moves, Paramount Vantage is conducting a MySpace contest which will award three people an all expenses paid trip to movie set to appear in one of the movie's scenes. Starring...well...no one, the movie follows the story of a girl who, after her sister's death from a drug overdoes, returns home from her sweet private school life to the crime-filled streets of her neighborhood where she takes up competitive step dancing.
Those interested in appearing in the booty-shaking dance-fest have until June 11 to send in their MySpace profile information to the contest's MySpace page. Once chosen and footage of their movie appearance is shot, paramount will place it on the promotional site as well as the profile pages of each of the three winners.
For Weta Workshops, which makes action figures and other collectible props for movies and stuff, New Zealand's Touch/Case Next gives us SteamPunk ray guns.
And best of all, the ray guns are real (if not really deadly, at least really for sale). Models like the ManMelter 3600ZX and the FMOM INDUSTRIES Wave Disrupter are "constructed from metal with some glass parts," and only 500 of each is being manufactured.
Tell us that doesn't bring your lawn dart-loving '80s baby out to play, and we will glower at you in disdain.
For our own purposes, the Goliathon 83 dissolves seven-ninths of an elephant in 10 earth seconds. We could really use that kind of power whilst standing in line at the post office.
The no blah, blah, blah auto insurance company, Desjardins General Insurance, with help from Toronto's Youthography, has launched a very GM Flying Car-like video in which three bubble-headed girls video each other until one lets out the classic "Oh...My God" after seeing her friends car take off into the sky for no apparent reason other than to slap up the geared4u.com URL which takes you to Desjardins' auto insurance site.
Once you arrive at the site, you can watch the very uncool parent-like figures utter parents-trying-to-be-coolims "ill" and "dizzle" while the kids get right to the important blah, blah, blah. It's all very Fetch.
If you've got to push a stroller you might as well have someplace to go while doing so. Dutch stroller company Bugaboo, with help from 72andSunny, has launched a new dedicated site for its Bugaboo Daytrips program which can be found at the oddly sexual sounding URL bugaboodaytrips.com (bug-a-booday-trips, get it? OK, fine it's just us. Sorry. On with the story)
The site provides 22 downloadable walking tours throughout major cities around the world. 72andSunny Creative Director and Co-Founder, 72andSunny explains, "When you become a parent, you want to maintain your identity as an adventurous, curious, active person. Bugaboo offers two ways to help. One is a line of multi-functional strollers; the other is now Bugaboo Daytrips. The daytrips are a great way for parents to discover the multi-functionality of their Bugaboo strollers." Ah, yes, the cure for the common minivan.
MySpace has become a total box office mouthpiece. When it's not all Silver Surfered-out, it's a poker table for Ocean's Thirteen (at left).
Littlejohn at Advertising for Peanuts wonders whether users will get turned off by the social networking darling's shameless ad-whoring (kind of like friend-whoring?) but we doubt it. If there was going to be a meaningful reaction to MySpace's games of homepage dress-up, it would've happened already. At this point we're all just watching the show go by.
Anyway, there are worse things in this life than a homepage swathed in George and Brad.
- Massachusetts, as has been discussed for some time, is considering a proposal that would create commercial free zones within public schools.
- Dunkin' Donuts and Mapquest have partnered for offer MyIcedCoffee, a site that helps travelers plan trips while making sure a Dunkin' Donuts is close by.
- George Parker meets advertising's New Kids on the Block at the PSFK London Conference and realizes there's hope for the business.
- Though not to the extent of the full on female bodybuilder freak show, Boddington Beer seemingly wants us to believe its beer gives women bulbous curves where we don't usually expect them.
- Ad spending in gay and lesbian publications in 2006 reached a record $223.3 million, an increase of 5.2 percent over 2005 and an increase of 205 percent since 1996, according to the 2006 edition of the Gay Press Report, the annual survey produced by advertising agency Prime Access Inc. and gay media representative firm Rivendell Media.
There are unconfirmed and likely false rumors floating about that Nike will sign a marketing deal with high school pole vaulting sensation Allison Stokke. A few weeks ago, Stokke became the subject of a leering Internet drool fest much to the chagrin of Stokke and her family who felt, first hand, what's it's like to be the object of Internet admiration. While images of Stokke are said to have been circulating for years, it wasn't until an image of her posing her her pole appeared on the sports blog With Leather that things broke loose.
Stokke, 18, is a senior at Newport Harbor high school in Newport Beach, California, set the freshman female pole vaulting record of 12' 8" and now jumps consistently over 13 feet. She's won titles, broken records and earned scholarships but now she's feeling the unfortunate fame of becoming an Internet celebrity. At first, she kept it a secret when friends tipped her her images were beginning to appear all over the Internet. Shortly after that she told her parents and has now considered consulting handlers to deal with all the sudden media attention.
This intentionally campy Cuervo season campaign takes jabs at Sportscenter but fails to be funny on its own. Plus, the Game Game sucks and everything takes too long to load. The tickers suck too.
Well, the idea was funny in theory.
Cuervo Season = Fail.
Apparently having "unalienable rights" can mean more for the common cow than just avoiding aliens. The fine folk at Sustainable Table have launched a campaign called Cows Unite, in which our bovine buddies battle it out for organic sustainability.
Check out the Bovine Bill of Rights, which states, among other things, that cows have the right to dignity and joy. Well, hey. Unlike the citizens of most countries, they clearly know what to ask for. No wonder the aliens are always abducting them.
We wonder what cows themselves would actually have to say about how much personality we project onto them. Would they laugh? Would they demand royalties in grassy knolls? Would they become self-conscious about their spots?