And by "understanding," that is to say "We'll buy your ad space, you write us up nice and pretty."
A funner statistic: one in five senior-level marketers admit their organizations have purchased advertising in exchange for an online news story, likely even favorable. These figures are up slightly from last year (17 percent versus this year's 19 percent), when five percent admitted to either paying editors or giving them gifts in exchange for upbeat coverage. It's all here, sugar booger.
And just so you know? Yeah, presents, particularly of a monetary or vice-oriented variety, work a lot better than lengthy pitches that start with "I am such a fan!" Products work too. That's what's called "market research."*
Image credit: Delightful Deliveries, which has yet to surprise us with gift-wrapped gratitude in exchange for pushing its logo in this piece.
Entries for this contest is the only way Saturn's Astra is getting any love. Not to say people aren't getting Warholian with it.
Like all hopeful online efforts, the effort also sports a pretty sparse Facebook app. I tried running a search for it on Facebook and got "Did you mean: kiss my ass?" alongside results that ironically do feature a lot of car-smooching, just not the Astra kind.
You gotta love skinny models. They wear clothes well, improve sales, make other women feel bad. The best part? They don't eat. Think of the savings!
A survey of 194 female college students, aged 18-24, found women feel uglier after seeing thin models. They are also more likely to buy products held in a gamine's claw than from ads with "regular-size models." (Here's a secret: none of us enjoy being characterized as "regular." It's like being called "homely" -- a big fat fucking slap in the face.)
Seeing thin models also made women less likely to accept a snack pack of Oreo cookies offered as a thank-you for their participation in the study. Well, no shit.
You know what a woman does want to do after seeing all those runway waifs? (Second to shopping, that is.) Drink. A lot. And that's why we're so keen on Gawker's coverage of the same survey. It's right next to a banner ad for Sobieski vodka. That's targeting to win!
Your mission: visit King of Cubicles. Play nice with balding man sporting poor choice of tie and dated Mac. The objective? Get him to hire you as the King of Cubicles.
After weaving your way through a sleep-inducing and earnestly uncomfortable interview process, you may or may not be made King. The perks? A car, a salary and a Nintendo Wii. A video resume proving your worthlessness can help turn the tide in your favor.
Put together by R/West for The Game Factory. I'm sure in another universe this site's a wild ride.
- McCain puts Obama on the same "soar high, fall hard" platform as Britney Spears and Paris Hilton. Probably because they're the only celebrities he knows. I like how the ad cuts to happy floaty music and a soft McCain profile. What a guy.
- See Microsoft-paid blogger give transparency a go for the i'm talkathon. Yeah. You heard me. Transparency.
- Enfatico's having trouble with that whole "being creative" thing.
- method products: so much more than hand syrups and toilet bowl cleaners. Think of them as a summer salad that doesn't know how to capitalize proper nouns.
- TiVo says relevant ads don't get skipped.
- Wendy's cutesy "good good" ad is objectively disgusting.
In an effort to prove email is more than a medium for spam, eHarmony and Datran Media, next Wednesday, will release a Dynamic Logic study highlighting the branding benefits of email...dubbed "inbox advertising" by some so as to, apparently, leave behind all the baggage the word "email" carries.
The study reveled "inbox advertising" made more than one third of people surveyed aware of a particular eHarmony campaign. The study also found, nebulously stated, "unaided brand awareness and brand favorability increased by significant percentage points as well." I guess we'll all have to wait until the study is released to find out exactly what that means.
Seriously. And they have accents.
Put together by WWAV Rapp Collins London, the destination lets you stuff human vocal chords into one of the pets available, or upload a shot of your own pet. A "virtual newshound" reads news headlines from its host site.
All this is to promote All About Pets, a British pet charity run by The Blue Cross. (The site's really nice: soothing colors and curvy corners and tags and widgets. Petcare has come a long way.)
Somebody sent us a link to El Lobo Rojo, an online video series that's airing all summer long.
Mostly it's just random shit, sort of like SickAnimation except nobody has a penis for a head, and nothing is funny. A guy sets his fake mustache on fire. Then some dude gets fired for not removing his tattoos. And then the prick that fires him sits around, talking schizophrenic nonsense through a promotional poster for The Love Guru.
If this is all we have to look forward to, please bring Dr. Horrible back.
Under the premise that if people could experience Vista firsthand, they'd love it, Microsoft decided to bamboozle a bunch of Vista-haters with The Mojave Experiment.
Groups of users were invited to try Mojave, the "newest version of Windows." After showering Vista with opinions of disdain, they gave Mojave a go and lavished it with compliments. Then they were told it was Vista.
HP's latest online video campaign, aimed at the back-to-school crowd, launches with "Shaun White and Friends Fight to Help Shower Hottie." Created by Feed Company, the piece (which reeks of Axe) begins and ends with cheap fortune cookie wisdom: Practice Random Acts of Chivalry.
This from the same people that brought us "Hands" and "Maestro"? You gotta be kidding.