As you likely know, we love to trash bad work here. We think it's our strong suit. We also have a short attention span and, thankfully to many, don't often go into lengthy detail in our trashings. But, we can appreciate and point to others who don't seem to have short attention spans and who take a keen interest in ripping apart every conceivable element of a piece of work.
Recently, new NBA franchise and former Seattle Supersonics the Oklahoma City Thunder unveiled a new logo and Denver Egotist commenter Bubba did us proud slamming every element of the work. Another commenter writes, "a team that steals basketball away from a deserving city because of an owner who wants to take his ball and go to his hometown (and much smaller city at that) deserves a shitty logo."
Need we say more?
...that whole "grammar" thing, though, you'll probably need to learn elsewhere.
The ad at left is part of a University of Phoenix campaign where consecutive ads finish the thought started by "University of...", probably with other gimpy platitudes:
University of seizing the day.
University of never giving up.
University of I CAN.
Ooh, just found a variant. University of my hopes. Didn't see that one coming.
In its latest TV campaign, Jimmy John's, America's Sandwich Delivery Experts, relieves tense situations with foot-longs and smiling delivery men. (Actually not a bad idea.)
The company is mostly midwest-based, and its ads are friendly and earnest -- deeply mid-western? -- even if not wildly original. The Bomb spot did make me laugh, but the effort overall only felt so-so.
While sandwich delivery may not really resolve hostage situations or smooth out an explosive case of nerves, I guess it could calm screaming schoolchildren. For half an hour.
Ads by The Ad Store.
Seems there's a lot of hatred out there for Adobe which, as we all know, has a pretty firm grasp on advertising's creative community. In fact, there's so much hatred, a site dedicated to that hatred, Dear Adobe, collect gripes about the company and its products. The number one gripe? "Why does the Acrobat Reader take two minutes to launch, and require updates twice a month, just to display PDF pages?"
The answer to that question? Who cares. Just use Foxit Reader (for Windows but available in Preview for Mac) and your Adobe Reader woes will be gone. That aside, there are hundreds of gripes on the site ranging from complaints about Photoshop, Adobe's installer and feature bloat.
Imagine it: endless champagne, a lively -- but intimate -- night life, creamy white sheets, Roman baths, and sweet nothings brimming from the mouths of chiseled strangers.
What's all this? Why, "The Life You Were Meant to Live," a less-than-subtle ploy by Leo Burnett/Chicago to get your pipe-dreaming ass into Caesars. Spots include:
o "I'll Have the Bubbliest Champagne" -- for the ladies!
o "Try it Before You Croak" -- for the couples! -- or maybe just singles that enjoy morning-after intimacy.
o "I'm the Funny Good Looking One" -- for graying men still pursuing validation!
Samsung partnered with the NFL to bring football fandom to the big screen. See a couple of the TV ads, lengthened for the 'net, at That's How I See It. A spot I've seen often is the one where a dad gives his son a Vikings helmet, heirloom-style, to wear while watching TV.
In general I feel like we've seen too much of this kind of thing before. (See fans! Fans like you! Fetch wallet!) But if you feel closely affiliated with a certain football team, maybe getting recognized by a big brand always feels fresh. Kinda like how I feel every time a rapper shouts my area code into a mic.
Arthur is among the few kid shows I still feel okay watching. It's wholesome, square and enriched with feel-good lessons.
Anywho, CVS and Hefty licensed Arthur's name and likeness to promote products, like the charming paper plate at left, to kids (and possibly nostalgic quarter-lifers). One plate by itself is friendly enough, but check out this disembodied constellation of Arthur characters, all ready to bear slices of cake on their noses. It's unsettling.
You know how Stamps.com lets you turn photos into stamps? I bet one day Hefty'll do that with paper dishware. Why eat off a fictional acquaintance when you could be scooping peanut butter out of Kid Sister's right earlobe?
Some chick sent us an email just dripping with faux indignation. It was all, "Have you seen this site? There hasn't been anything so demeaning to women in the history of the internet!" Don't be a tease, honey, just say it: DEAR ADRANTS, PLEASE WHORE ECKO MFG.
And boy is it worthy. The job ECKO MFG tries accomplishing, with almost cheesy earnestness, is stirring drama over Ecko's "SEXIST!!!" manufacturing practices: bikini-clad women stitching jeans together. It could be The Stepford Sweatshop -- if Connecticut were ruled by frat boys and not WASPs.
- Copyranter calls it quits. Again. Don't worry, he'll still be writing for Animal New York, and he's open to sponsorship.
- Speaking of sponsorship, HBO whips out some wad for web celebs like lonelygirl15. The network is rounding up YouTube headliners for a web series called Hooking Up. Witness the lameness.
- Degourget doesn't like Esquire's first-ever digital magazine cover, which was sponsored by the "ugly-assed Ford Flex." The price we pay for bells and whistles.
- Clear Channel Radio hosted an event called Stripped, where artists play "stripped-down" versions of songs in a jammy "unplugged" setting. Why is this news? Because Miley Cyrus performed Girls Just Wanna Have Fun, that's why. Everything involving Miley Cyrus is news, especially when the headline reads "MILEY CYRUS STRIPPED."
To facilitate the all-online launch of Kit Kat Cookies & Cream (on the record: yuck), Nestle got into bed with JWT/Sydney and RMG Connect to conceive Hans Fagerlund, whom they describe as "a cross between Jack Black and Will Ferrell."
That's some fucked-up cross-breeding.
Our little freak Hans is also a Chunga Champion, Chunga being the art of stacking Cookies and Cream Kit-Kats with his bare hands. Seriously. It's Jenga! With calories!