OfficeMax Justifies Reuse of Elf Yourself Campaign ... with Quantitative Figures!

Here's a crazy notion -- demonstrating the success of your online "viral" with real-live numbers. Vague claims of "brand resonance" be damned!

For its uber-creepy Elf Yourself campaign -- enjoying a souped-up second year run -- OfficeMax has listed the following figures that (maybe?) demonstrate its success.

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Come On Now, Even Wales Got Schooled in Existentialism

Here's an ad for Brecon Five vodka that got people's panties in a twist because it plays on the stereotype that Welsh people are stupid. (We never heard that, but we did hear they were cannibals.)

Brecon Five is a label under the Welsh Whisky Company. It's not the only vodka ever to poke fun at its heritage to make itself look better.

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Election Encumbents Play Paintball for Presidency

Why strain the dancing girls for votes when the 2008 presidential candidates can play paintball instead?

On Miniclip, they can. And thank heavens. Nothing says POTUS like a paintball ass-kicker. (We'd say Hillary's got the competitive advantage there. We bet she's loaded with quiet rage!)

Triumph Boat Baits Anglers With Fish Fry Feeding Frenzy

Does PETA care about fish? If they do, they might not like this new ad campaign from Triumph boats which promotes a Triumph Boat-sponsored "Feeding Frenzy" fishing tournament. With a Game Fish Identification Chart, the campaign, tagged "Good For You, Bad For The Fish," gleefully celebrates the all you can eat fish fry.

The campaign, created by The Republik in Durham, NC, includes posters, print and t-shirts to aid Triumph dealers in co-ordinating their individual fish fry events. And in case PETA wants to stage a protest, The first event will be held January 18 at Merritt Marine in Hillsborough, NC.

Quebec's Crea Award Campaign Gets Crea...tive

At first, we were going to trash this campaign for Quebec's Crea Awards (formerly known as Gala des Coqs D'Or) created by Montreal agency Bos for several reasons. First, unless you live in Quebec, you've likely never heard of the Crea Awards (or its former incarnation). Second, as one of the creatives featured in the campaign, unless you create work that appears in this market, you'll never be in the running anyway. Third, highlighting the fact the world's creative leaders (excusing DDB Canada's Alan Russell) such as Alex Bogusky, Oliver Altmann, Pablo Del Campo or Tony Granger haven't won a Crea is like saying U2 never won some local music competition. It's meaningless.

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Never in Our Lives Have We Equated Golf with Sex. Not Recently, Anyway

Adrants reader Matt pointed us in the direction of this strange site for Mizuno's Demo the Difference campaign.

Those little golf club capsules are amusingly phallic. And we love those beams of light that shoot into the air when you mouse over one. Way to draw eyeballs!

To Find New Flavor, the Dew Launches Dystopian Virtual World

Crowdsourcing meets sci-fi meets a quasi-virtual world in Mountain Dew's exploding head-inducing campaign, DEWmocracy.

Supported by traditional advertising, DEWmocracy paints a dismal future filled with corporate suits that travel in the backs of pick-up trucks, and where high fructose corn syrup is considered a magical elixir capable of overthrowing big brother.

Through the site, the Dew ultimately aims to put consumers on an adventure to come up with its newest flavor and packaging, while grabbing as much marketing data on its brave virtual freedom fighters.

Fresh with ideas from his performance in Battlefield Earth, Forest Whitaker helped entertainment concept firm Protagonist in creating this brave dew world.

Belvedere Heads Downtown, Kicks Grey Goose's Uptown Ass

It must suck being a premium vodka maker when you're not one of the two or three brands that, for whatever unknown reason, seem to take off and get adopted by those enjoy emptying their wallet just to get drunk. While Grey Goose sold 700,000 cases in 2006, Belvedere sold just 380,000.

In a new $20 million Berlin Cameron-created campaign, Belvedere is crashing the party with ads featuring Vincent Gallo and his posse literally crashes uptown parties with downtown attitude. There's also a Terry Richardson-shot print campaign with lots of red lipstick and provocative stares.

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Even Experienced Drinkers Get Hangovers, HANG Cures All Ills

You've gotta love a country that isn't politically correct 24/7 by shying away from the fact people drink alcohol. Oh sure, Americans drink all kinds of alcohol on a regular basis but we like to equate drinking to some artificial social status or lifestyle and we never, ever talk about getting a hangover. After all, everyone in America has been beaten over the head with the "drink responsibly" message.

While Sky Vodka did tout it's hangover-free qualities several years back but, for the most part, we don't like to talk about the simple fact alcohol makes you drunk and gives you a hangover if you drink too much of the stuff.

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Bra Maker Enlists Holocaust Survivor Look-A-Likes For Campaign

Japanese bra maker Maruko is getting witty in a new Asatsu-DK-created campaign that fixates on the bronski, the act of getting one's face smooshed between a pair of breasts. While certainly a pleasurable experience, the two guys in these two ads look more like they've endured a Holocaust camp than the pleasures of a big pair of soft, fleshy breasts.

This is certainly a new addition to the long list of quirky approached bra makers have taken to get their product noticed. Wonderbra has proven its ability to confine breasts in motion with a spoof of the Cadbury Gorilla commercial and the fact their push up bras make women's breasts so big they cause problems. Playtex has asked women to submit funny stories about their experiences with their bras. Vanity Fair has playfully used lighting tricks to cover the female nipple. Chantelle Push-Up bras push up more than just beasts.

Sloggi just bares as much ass as it can. Bravissimo gets people past the over D cup stigma with properly fitted F, G and GG bras. Hanes signed Ghost Whisperer star Jennifer Love Hewit, the only woman who is as equally obsessed about breasts as men are. Victoria's Secret has gone the route of glamorizing the bra to the point it deserves its own television spectacle. And U.K. bra company Shock Absorber created a website where people can go watch breasts bounce.

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