- George Parker's next opus, The Ubiquitous Persuaders will be out in January. Madison Avenue take cover.
- David Armano gets his wiener whistle (d?)
- Jessica Alba gets even more curvaceously hot courtesy of Photoshop's Liquify.
- The Webby Awards is out with a call for entries promotion for its 13th Annual Webby Awards. Five "internet video stars," including Obama Girl, will take part in individual videos hyping the event.
- Once again, AgencySpy's Matt Vanhoven gets up off the crapper to deliver another Week in Advertising.
- A whiff of Hugo Boss Femme may put you in a self-adulating, decidedly Diddy state of mind.
- Twitter marketing toolbox. *twirls finger*
- Contemplating facial hair? Upload your likeness here. For Schick -- which may actually lose customers that may have otherwise grown mustaches out before realizing they looked like Super Mario. (And not in an awesome, sliding-through-the-magic-pipe kinda way.)
- Bob Knorpp contemplates the legal saga of the Bratz. Complete with at least three hooker jokes.
- This HP Mini 1000 is brought to you by Vivienne Tam. We find them semi-sassy.
- Hey Facebook, "your dreams of avarice are fucked."
- Just another world record-breaking stunt.
- Cab driver advertises MBA credentials to customers. One good thing you can say about this economy: it makes everyone a marketer.
They're versatile! They're powerful! They have beards and many adjectives!
Lean back while this Al Borland-looking dude and his tanned-but-silent sidekick sell you a snowboard for all seasons. Look familiar? They should! Your host is Billy Mays, high king of insomnia-enabling infomercials, and his snowboarding homie is Iikka Backstrom.
"Enjoy the ride more!" with DC's new line of snowboards and boots. More infomercial riffs here.
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Having failed (twice!) to woo young defectors with ads, Microsoft tries appealing to their unending quest for ironic shirts.
The so-called Softwear line of tees joins Crispin Porter + Bogusky's ongoing "I'm a PC" campaign. Common -- who already appears in ads for Microsoft's Zune -- infused the shirts with retro cred and his own '80s-inspired designs.
Variants include:
o The DOS Tangle: "The first logo you saw on a screen."
o The 101: "Learn to speak the language." Oooh, binary.
o The Misdemeanor: "Everyone deserves a second chance."
There's something the world needs now: mugshots of Bill Gates prowling the streets.
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Two relics of the old guard try something new in these print ads for Marc Jacobs/Louis Vuitton, featuring Madonna. Variant.
There's a lot going on -- those stringy shoes, chunky witch doctor bangles and a hair skirt, of all bloody things -- but like we said to our friend Jeremy Dante (who passed the ads over), Madonna's career is a defiant chin-jut to an industry that swallows young divas, warps their minds and spits them out as lesser animals.
She's an edgy classic, imperfect, unbridled but timeless -- and that's a niche LV can do something with.
That question is rhetorical.
Brazilian actor Caua Raymond is auctioning off a hunk of chewed Trident that he kept in his mouth, just for the fans, for exactly 15 minutes.
Video below! Hope you speak Portuguese. Diggin' how Raymond has a dude with a tray and a glass receptacle, hanging around for moments like this one.
For reasons I sure don't understand, the vid is the most-viewed on YouTube Brazil today (280,743 views and counting). The "winner" of this spit-saturated dream-pebble gets to meet Raymond in a ceremony, where the money raised from the auction will be donated to charity.
So Trident, I guess that highlarious mastication movie just didn't work out for you...?
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Tomorrow Chanel.com debuts Coco Avant Chanel, a 10-minute silent film celebrating the legend of Mademoiselle Coco -- pre-dating her existence as a brand demi-god.
The film was directed by Karl Lagerfeld, the only person alive who can make a safety vest look chic. Leaving us to salivate with nary but film stills and a trailer so pitch-perfect it makes smoking sexy again, Lagerfeld haughtily confided his distaste of movie extras.
"They don't know how to touch the clothes," he whispered coolly before toasting us* -- an action that made chills travel from glass to torso.
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Wieden + Kennedy/Amsterdam reprise the intro to The Pink Panther with this catchy spot for Nike's Mercurial Vapor IV.
"He's a gentleman, a scholar, he's an -- acrobat!"
Cheeky. Wait for the tooth-gleam at :47. Makes me wanna watch soccer while cuddling a plush Ribery doll.
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The ad cash just keeps pouring in for Ozzy Osbourne. Fresh off that Samsung spot for Leo Burnett, he's enlisted with Mojo for a World of Warcraft promotion.
The more blitzed he is, the better. And it probably only helps when he makes batshit-insane statements like, "Well, maybe you're the one who's been riding a fucking CRAZY TRAIN!" while teetering. (In case you didn't catch that with your ears, captions -- now a staple for Ozzy cameos -- have been included.)
At spot's end, WoW's "What's your game?" slogan is modified with yet another bleeped-out F-bomb.
Just another piece of high art by production company Green Dot Films. The latter called it the most-viewed spot on YouTube this weekend. We don't know about that, but ratings have been generous.
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In what simply has to be a joke, Sean Combs/John/Whatever released a video (which he painfully calls "a blog" ... it's a POST, people. A POST on a BLOG) for the movie I Am King. And the best part? He wants to be the next James Bond. Seriously. Or not.
The entire campaign -- which promotes his new fragrance -- is so far fetched, it's not easy to discern the difference between joke and cringe-worthy creative intent.
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