We literally choked on our Juicy Juice when we saw this guerrilla effort for Hammertime, a new A&E show that follows the family life of MC Hammer -- kinda like Run's House.
"Each week we'll open our home to viewers to showcase the hectic pace of our lives and our eclectic family; our real life truly is drama," said MC Hammer, who apparently thinks drama is a marvel unique to his universe.
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It's telling that eclectic music lover @quikness apprised us of this ad, featuring Dr. Dre for Dr Pepper, with nothing but a sad face. That's pretty much how we felt when Dre gave us his whole "slower is better" spiel -- a philosophy for hip-hop hits and Dr Pepper drinking etiquette.
For Dr Pepper's "Trust me, I'm a doctor!" effort, Dr. Dre joins a colourful list of other non-doctors that made careers out of pretending to be: Dr. Love and Dr. J.
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30Rock's Jane Krakowski appears in this tacky ravaging of Gone with the Wind for Breyer's ice cream.
And while we can appreciate the seamless integration of a contemporary (if hardly worthy) Scarlett O'Hara, it disgusts us to no end when she puts on the Southern simper and weds her crappy girls-night-out-fantasy dialogue to Rhett's timeless hot/cold leading man ditties.
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Tim Gunn knows a thing or two about fashion. By association, he knows a thing or two about laundry detergent. Strike that. He only knows what Tide pays him to know. In a recent Tide Total Care commercial, Tim touts the anti-fading qualities of the product.
Taking Tim's Tide claims to task is Consumer Report's Theresa Panetta who examines the commercial's claim Tide won't fade clothing after 30 washes. After testing the claim against two other detergents, Consumer Reports found Tide Total Care faded a test dress "just a little bit" compared to All Small and Mighty.
But the big insight was discovering the third detergent, Tide 2X Ultra Coldwater, did just as well as the other Tide detergent, Total Care, at half the price.
So while Tide's commercial claim is technically true, they'd rather us not know they make another product that does just as ell but costs half as much. Greedy bastards.
Fresh out the Harry Potter franchise, Emma Watson returns to earth on behalf of Burberry, which managed to score her in full postpubescent splendour.
She's clearly not the geeky kid witch we all took her for -- although this Mary Poppins-esque carpet bag leaves us with the sense she may have a few tricks yet. Or maybe she's just hiding an oversized umbrella that conjures the east wind when she needs to make life-changing nanny trips.
Brought to us by the incomparable Jeremy Dante.
Longtime coach Barry Switzer invades the locker room of the St. Anne's Ladies Lacrosse team, which is more interested in campfires than in kicking some padded ass. Fast discouraged by the ladies' refusal to be pep-talked (which is something we practice in the mirror every morning while primping), he wanders off on a quest for a donut.
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Working with YouTube, Justine Ezarik (iJustine) created a video for Carl's Jr. in which she plays the duel role of Carl's Jr. employee and customer. She perfectly epitomizes the valley girl of yesteryear and, at the same time, the confused customer of today.
Entitled How to Eat a Burger, the video - following the employee/customer exchange - tells us how to eat a burger iJustine style. Yea, she likes to eat her burger with a fork, knife and lots of ketchup. LOTS and LOTS of ketchup. Never quite understood that method but hey, to each their own.
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Sally Ride, Jim Lovell and Buzz Aldrin bring stargazer's wonder to this piece by Louis Vuitton. Shot by Annie Leibovitz, the astronauts will grace July issues just in time to commemorate the 40th anniversary of the Apollo 11 mission to the moon.
Antoine Arnaut, head of communications at LV in France, says each spacewalker donated a "significant" portion of their modeling fees to Al Gore's Climate Project. As for the bag at left, it's the Vuitton Icare -- an elbow ornament named after Icarus, an icon of Greek myth who dies after flying too close to the sun, losing his wings and plummeting back to earth.
Not the bag I'd've chosen to feature with survivors of a successful sky-bound mission, but hey, I suppose it's nice that Icarus, Aldrin, Lovel and Ride all have something in common: a lust for that final frontier.
Oh, yeah. You may have noticed Neil Armstrong is missing. This wasn't an oversight on LV's part; after an entreaty or two, "he thought it probably wasn't the right thing to do," Arnault admits.
This June Kid Rock kicks off the Red Stag, part of a promotional partnership with Jim Beam for its new cherry-infused Bourbon.
It all goes down on the 14th, when Kid Rock serves as Grand Marshall of the NASCAR Sprint Cup's Lifelock 400 Race. Jim Beam will sponsor Kid Rock's 2009 Rock N' Rebels tour, and together, via Operation Homefront, both brands will raise funds for emergency aid, moving help, computer programs and care packages for the underprivileged nationwide.
"I've been drinking Jim Beam and singing about it my whole career, so when they approached us it was a no-brainer," said Kid Rock, who makes plen'y more sense than crazy-ass Gene Simmons did when he became the face of Dr. Pepper Cherry.
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So the whole Susan Boyle Britain's Got Talent thing has been peripheral to us and for good reason. We already have American Idol fever right? And besides, the whole thing was yet another indication all we care about is what people look like and not what's inside them or what sort of talent they may have.
This frumpy looking woman walks on stage and she's instantly judged some sort of loser because she's not beautiful and young and perfect. But as soon as she opened her mouth, everyone had to eat their cynicism and come to the realization we place way too much importance on exterior appearances.
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