At left is the baby I made with Johnny Depp, courtesy of the Routan Babymaker3000.
The babymaker's part of a broader Volkswagen Routan campaign featuring Brooke Shields. You've probably seen the ads where she barrages expecting couples with questions about why they're having babies "simply for the love of German engineering." (I didn't really get this at first, but after sitting through the mocumentary, I completely understand: people are having babies so they can buy minivans! Of course!)
MasterCard's "Priceless" is one of those campaigns you wanna milk as long as possible: it makes a statement about what people value, and potential variations are endless.
But the "product, price tag; product, price tag; sentiment = priceless" formula has gotten stale. And unfortunately for MasterCard, competitors like Visa and American Express have taken advantage of its stagnation to launch their own heart-wrenching commentaries on society.
Holiday Inn takes on an odd feat: convincing people that staying at a Holiday Inn Express will make you smarter.
You'll freestyle like Del the Funky Homosapien, outshine doctors in emergency situations involving Cal Ripken, Jr., and -- if you have the good fortune of conceiving a baby in a Holiday Inn Express -- that kid will be capable of handling sharp objects at close proximity. From birth.
Strange but true. Three ads in a row can't lie.
I dug the rapper spot. The rest were sorta kitschy. Well, the rapper one was kitschy too, but it had that "dream fulfilled!" element to it. How many of us don't want to unexpectedly kick ass in a Lyricist Lounge situation? It's one of the biggest geek fantasies of all-time -- right up there with being proclaimed royal heir to a small island, and being told your Tetris skills might save the world.
Well Christ on a Cracker, Britney Spears is back in the ad world hyping her latest fragrance, Hidden Fantasy. It's her seventh fragrance to date and the ads haven't changed one bit. Still the same vapid, heavily Photoshopped look. The same flowery visuals. The same cheesy headlines. It seems like forever ago she was all over the pages of Adrants either hyping some product or simply doing something stupid.
Today, she seems to have her act together and might, once again, reign supreme amongst the tween, teen and advertising sets.
The fragrance, with the headline, "What do you have to hide?" is being called a "seductive scent that is all about expressing the many mysterious sides of a woman."
Just what is up with America and its refusal to accept the fact sex is natural and people do it all the time? Why do we shun it in movies and advertising while we gleefully glamorize and applaud violence and rampant stupidity?
Video games. Michael Bay movies. The Saw series of movies. All celebrate violence for the purposes of making money. And people love it. And spend billions on it. And rarely complain about it but sex...oh no. God forbid people actually celebrate the natural, biological joy of sex without coming off as some sort of perv trying to terrorize and sully the minds of poor little children.
In a new pro-Obama commercial from MoveOn.org which plays out like a drug PSA, Gossip Girl Upper East Sider Serena Vanderwoodsen feels so strongly about Obama she says, "if you're ever out somewhere and considering about voting McCain, just call me. I'll pick you up. No questions asked."
While it centers on the not so correct assumption all McCain supporters are old and all Obama supporters are young, it does do an effective job spoofing a genre that has become ingrained in the minds of the younger generation, many of whom would love nothing more than to have Serena not ask any questions while picking them up.
This may sound improbable, but "goddess of money" Ivanka Trump (don't you love PR people?) gives a damn what you have for lunch at work every day. Enough to blog about it, even.
She's partnering with ConAgra for something called the Lunch Trade. I'm not sure what it entails (Handi-Snacks but bigger? City-wide buffets? Mass sandwich-swap? Anything goes!) but it'll reportedly "impact" 15,000 employees across NYC and Chicago.
Wow. Sounds almost like genocide. Keep reading her blog for more details.
Hayden Panettiere, the tortured chick on Heroes who can never die, joins an assembly line of celebrities hoping to affect your vote.
"There are three things think I all citizens should do: smoke cigarettes, vote for John McCain, and don't wear a seatbelt," she says with vigor, tossing in a few wild "FUCKs" for shock value.
You get the gist. Thank Funny or Die, creators of this and that high-larious Paris Hilton for President video -- another effort that makes Obama look incidentally good by making McCain look old and out of touch.
You probably know Baz Luhrmann by reputation, if not by name. He directed Strictly Ballroom, a tribute to the art of dance; Romeo + Juliet, his altar to the written word; and Moulin Rouge!, a garish but dazzling musical homage to pop culture.
He's just completed his latest film, Australia. I don't know much about it, but -- here's an interesting twist -- he's promoting it through a tourism gig.
DDB Worldwide -- which represents Tourism Australia -- tapped Lurhmann for its "Come Walkabout" campaign, which is technically for Australia but also for Australia. In the debut spot, a mystical (and naked?) little boy encourages a stressed woman to defect from her unraveling life.
June 10, 2007: We never thought we'd tire of the millions of erectile dysfunction spoofs that have found there way to us but we finally have. It's just not that much fun anymore to listen to a fake voice over drone on about 36 hour erections while a dude walks around with a big dick prop sticking out of hin his pants. Except, of course, when that dick prop and closing elevator doors are in the same scene and the spoof stars Cuba Gooding Jr.