You Know, I Must've Missed the Fire-Breathing Seahorses Exhibit.

If this new Visa Go ad is any authority, America's favourite check card wants you to take your kids to the nearest (kaleidoscopic, CGI'ed-out!) aquarium. On a Tuesday.

OK work, nicely cinched with wonderstruck expression of child and soothing voice of Morgan Freeman. By TBWA\Chiat\Day for -- you guessed it -- Visa Go. (AKQA joint-orchestrated the campaign at large.)

More on Go's interactive features here.

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'Gonorrhea? Oh ... You Shouldn't Have!'

Trojan illustrates how nobody wants to get an STD with help from a girl who gets one for her 21st birthday -- and is pretty stoked about it, actually.

"No one wants to get an STD, but 1/3 of sexually active people do by age 25," a sobering textover says, at which point Birthday Girl screeches, "Wait 'til I show my mom!" and we shudder in quiet agony.

By Kaplan Thaler Group/NY and production company Hero Content.

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Yawn. 'Much-Anticipated' Dairy Ad Disappoints

Much-anticipated? Seriously? Yes, that is how this new commercial, Arm Wrestling, for the British Columbia Dairy Foundation is being touted. Part of the BCDF's Must Drink More Milk campaign, the DDB Vancouver-created cinema ad pits one big arm against two smaller...but milk-drinking arms. The outcome is predictable.

Thankfully this is bit one of 14. One hopes at least one of the yet to be seen 13 is actually "much-anticipated."

'Teenagers' Convince Teenagers to Drive Slower

Every possible method of convincing young people to drive slower and more carefully has been done. Everything from light humor to horrifically gut-wrenching emotional manipulation has been put to use. Does any of it work? You'll have to ask the statisticians for the answer to that questions.

In an update to the Ad Council's Youth Reckless Driving Prevention campaign, Y&R New York is out with four new commercials which involve the goofball "teenage friend" joining a threesome in a car and, through different tactics, convince the kids to slow down. They're quite tame compared to many of the more extreme examples we've seen.

One might say they were lame but they are so ingratiatingly squirm-inducing, they just might keep people's attention long enough to garner at least a tiny bit of consideration.

Viagra's 'Couple' Touches Us Where We Least Expect It

Everything about Viagra makes us laugh. We all know what it's for (and spam has ensured that we never forget!), but the ads are never really about doin' The Do -- they're always about love and intimacy, which in this jaded world is a lot like taking the sluggish scenic route to the same destination.

So, fingertips at the ready, we watched "Couple" with the full intention of taking the piss out of it. And get this: we couldn't. Because it moved us.

Yeah, we're embarrassed too.

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Midea AC: Pretty and All, but a Bit Too Bright for Comfort

Household appliance firm Midea tapped Transistor Studios and Ogilvy/Shanghai to promote its compact air conditioning (AC) product line.

"Dream" depicts a sleek, energy-efficient AC that self-repairs, senses changes in the environment and apparently morphs like the space ship in Flight of the Navigator.

That's exciting and all, but the skeletal arms and single eye had us picturing HAL, poring over us as we sleep, breathing frosty air onto the hair on our necks before spiriting us into cruel oblivion.

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Tums: Not Animal-Tested, But Probably Animal-Friendly...?

Tums manifests its antacid magic in "Angry Bear," where the aforementioned animal steals food, overeats and goes back in for one more score: the Tums.

There's something about the sight of a bear, far-off and out of decapitation range, that totally numbs us to its potential malevolence. It's like, "Aww, look at the bear eating all the pizza. Look at the bear breaking the watermelon. Look at the bear getting the Tums for its tummy."

You kind of want to curl up around it and fall asleep while it's lying against one of those gutted cars, nursing a food hangover.

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Department of Energy Compels Kids to Lose Their Excuse

To make kids act more energy-smart, the Department of Energy launched Lose Your Excuse, a painfully cute website* that encourages engagement and boasts a 10-step energy "action plan" to download.

Two quirky little ads drive traffic in its direction. Each features a kid getting caught in a lie about why s/he hasn't become more energy efficient. (I know that vibes like the Spanish Inquisition, but the execution is feel-good and funny).

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Clean Coal is So Clean It's An Air Freshener

Hmm. So Crispin Porter + Bogusky asks the Coen Brothers to do a spot for their client, The Reality Coalition, to poke fun at the notion there's such a thing as clean coal. Aside from the irony of the word "coal" being in the cause group's name, the Coen Brothers do an OK job withe the cheesy spokesman approach.

In the commercial, the spokesman says, "clean coal harnesses the awesome power of the word clean," as the wife half of the couple he's speaking to sprays black clouds out of an aerosol can. Complete with coughing kids, the spots also claims "clean goal is supported by the coal industry, the most trusted name in coal."

You see? Just like the word clean guarantees your clothes will be clean in laundry detergent ads, the word clean in clean coal ads assures the same, right?

Picturesque Mountain Cabin + Lingerie = Seriously Twisted Ad

As we have come to expect from Agent Provocateur, weird is normal. So, in this new commercial, it makes perfect sense a lingerie-clad woman in ironing on the front porch of a mountain cabin while the strangest of music plays in the background.

And that she then goes inside to go all S&M the guy laying in bed.

Yes. Agent Provocateur.

Provocative.