Rape is Funny When It's Happening to Hot Dogs ... Right?

... in the world according to Wienerschnitzel. (Push play on the right-hand side.)

Well, maybe the vibe is less like rape and more like cannibalism. Either way, it's malicious and creepy.

To demonstrate the irresistibility of its wieners, Wienerschnitzel's running an ad where a talking hot dog tries convincing Eskimos to move beyond an all-blubber diet. Horrors ensue when they look to him for comfort.

Neither funny nor appetizing.

Coke Brings Out Your Inner Egalitarian ... and If We Were You, We'd Stuff it Back In

The ads are French and they debut on the 26th of this month.

The tagline: "Avec Coca-Cola, on parle tous football," which translates to something like "With Coca-Cola, everyone speaks football," which is a roundabout way of saying Coca-Cola makes football buddies of unlikely pairs.

That's sweet and all. But we wouldn't embrace a brain-eating dead guy, or a head-smashing toy, or a displaced octopus for any refreshing beverage. If that's prejudice then we are guilty as charged, and happy to be thirsty.

That 'Banned' Wendy's Commercial Continues to Spread

In case you haven't seen it (though it's a year old so maybe you have), here's the "banned" Wendy's Spicy Chicken Sandwich commercial it's creator claims he created but was not approved by the client. He says Wendy's has nothing to do with it but we're sure they're quietly smiling over the video's growing popularity.

A Well-Intended Rip-Off's Still a Rip-Off, Frankly

Check out this "Awareness Test" for Transport of London. The goal is to demonstrate that a driver can't avoid obstacles s/he doesn't expect to see. For people who've never seen the video before, it probably comes across as a neat way to deliver the message.

The problem is, there are plenty of people who have already seen something similar -- likely this video, which was put together in 1999 by Professor Daniel Simons of the University of Illinois.

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Love? THAT'S Your Big Solution?!

"Jump," featuring the furry friendly Gaspar, is an attempt by Dentsu Canada to push Vespa out of the "pseudo-bike" realm and into ... well ... hrm.

Come on, Dentsu. Can't you make Vespa sexy without inviting a comparison to Blades of Glory? Oh, and the whole "Vespa: Built for love!" thing doesn't make it any easier for Vespa owners to scoot proudly down the driveway with their chins up. Well, unless they're in Europe.

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Cottonelle Wants to Be Kind to Your Behind

To retain its position as the quilted ass-polisher of choice, Cottonelle has launched a campaign called "Be Kind to Your Behind."

See the TV spot and associated outdoor print.

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For Chinese Olympian, Silver's Just a Po' Man's Gold

More Beijing Olympics/Adidas gorgiosity by TBWA/China and Psyop. This one tells the story of Hu Jia, a competitive diver who in five years won a slew of Olympian silvers before taking the gold in Athens. Great mix of individual determination and community pride in these spots.

See previous efforts for the "Impossible is Nothing" campaign.

Orbit Gum Puts the Spritz on Janice Dickinson

And boy does she need it. (Janice Dickinson fills us with dangerous emotions, mostly of rage and quiet angst.)

The ad was put together by BBDO and presented to us by an agency guy who finds the Orbit Gum campaign un-funny. Don't worry, man. We do too.

George Bush, Al Pacino, Donald Trump Hawk DISH Network

These are really, really bad! No, wait, these are really, really good! No wait....damn it, we're conflicted about this new DISH Network work sent to us from Fueld (yes, that's spelled correctly) Films. In the three commercials, comedian Frank Caliendo takes on the personas of Al Pacino, Donald Trump and George Bush. He does a fairly good job but we're not sure these commercials sold us anything.

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VEGAS.com Employees Have it Good. Real Good.

Aw, this is cute. Watch an apathetic VEGAS.com employee explore Sodom on a Segway. We like it best when he rejects the strawberry like it's poo.

This is part of a spankin'-new VEGAS.com TV campaign called "The Vegas Experts." It cost a total of $20 million. Other spots -- produced by Stella Productions -- will follow the exploits of the Las Vegas geek squad as they go about their daily business, which is nothing like cog life anywhere else in corporate America.

Featured celebrities will include The Blue Man Group, Carrot Top and Louie Anderson against backdrops like Jubilee, Fantasy, X Burlesque and Le Reve (where this ad takes place).