Failure of Life Support Needs No Interpretation

It's always nice when an ad makes such good use of symbols, sounds and gestures that it doesn't need some unfortunate content guy to translate the text across 15 languages.

This spot for groen.be just implores "Save Our Planet!" - which is apt, because that's what it's called. It could have been about 45 seconds shorter, though.

Corona = Jumanji. Bring Big Umbrella, and Bug Spray.

We're trying to decide what we can say about this ad, short of "Corona makes Jumanji." But no, we can't think of anything.

If you drink Corona, you will have Jumanji. Or screaming orgasms. Hopefully not both at the same time.

Yes, Johnny, The Yellow Pages Do Still Exist

Though it's hard to believe, people, apparently, still use the yellow pages. Or at least yellow pages publishers would certainly like people to.Or maybe it's just an Israeli thing. Young & Rubicam Israel sends us these outdoor boards which continue the endless creative twists that yellow pages categories offer for fodder. From circumcision to couples therapy, this campaign still finds humor in a decidedly boring category. See all the boards here and a TV spot here.

Smart, Snarky Audi Ads Leave Watchers Feeling Dirty

Based on its last pair of efforts (1, 2) we decided that ad-wise, Audi's getting pretty - and flippant too, a quality that's lost in luxury car ads that get by on status alone.

Venables, Bell & Partners, San Francisco and production company OUTSIDER USA got together to continue the trend with a couple of new spots.

Moments for the Audi TT plays the tease with meaningful moments cut tantalizingly short, smugly signifying that while you can't get much done in .02 seconds, you can at least change gears. Really, really fast.

Parking is a spot for the A4. The action and length betray an unmistakable fuck-you to marks like Lexus, which features parking assistance technology.

In the world of high speed and hot bumpers, Audi's positioned as the innocuous-chick-turned-hot-bitchy-babe, and everyone wants to like her anyway.

Carlton Draught Gets Candid in Surround-Sound-Worthy Spots

There's nothing the assertive audience likes more than a company that puts all its cards on the table.

So if you're going to be honest about pushing your hops, you might as well do it in an epic way: with a score, some choir robes dyed in primary colours, and a giant esophagus made up of burly men running in circles.

There's more industry jabbing in another spot from the same series. "Fermented in a big metal thing!" We love that drama-soaked tone. Anheuser-Busch, which is trying really hard to get beer taken seriously, must be gnashing its teeth in aggravation.

The spots fall under the tactful slogan "Made from Beer" and are for Carlton Draught. We hope they sell lots of bloody beer.

Wendy's. Tree-Kicking. Revolution. What?

We should start by saying that by the time we got to watching this ad for Wendy's by Saatchi & Saatchi, we were already a bit out-of-sorts because the eagle in this Unicast ad kept squawking. Eagles are just generally really distracting. They are exactly the opposite of ninjas.

Anyway, this Wendy's piece involves communal tree-kicking and a burger-inspired epiphany by a guy wearing the Wendy's girl wig. We're not really sure why. And if it does nothing else, the spot decently demonstrates that people who do stupid crap as a team will probably band together behind something equally inane.

To be fair, though, we'd rather watch this ad than another I'm-Lovin'-It rehash.

Questionably Named Jig-A-Loo Repels, Lubricates

This is so bad it's good because it knows we'll know it's bad and think it's good even though it knows we'll say it's bad but mean it's good. Got it? No. OK then just watch this video for Jigaloo, a recently introduced to the States invisible, odorless, stain-free, all around lubricant (no, not that kind you pervert) and water repellent. Watch as sticky windows are opened and the President gets "unstuck." Unfortunately, it's name is way too close to the not so nice racial slur, jigaboo.

Hardee's Wants You to Have Sex With Its Mega-Burger

It's one thing to use a sexy, scantily clad woman to, by association, promote your mega-burger of the month. It's another thing entirely to liken the eating of that mega-burger to the eating...uh...spending intimate time with that sexy, scantily-clad woman. But that's what Hardee's is doing in its latest babe-on-a-burger commercial in which Patty counts down the ten steps of eating the burger like you were having sex with her. Sex with a woman, groovy. Sex with a burger, eeew.

Svedka Operates Beyond Realm of Human Understanding

We don't claim to understand Svedka's ad campaigns. To be honest, we don't even really want to, because it would force us to think too hard, and that would probably be playing right into the hands of the more efficient stainless-steel race.

What we know: there are fembots. The fembots are political. They might even take over. And for some reason beyond us, there's a gay theme.

That's all we need to know, really. But Copyranter finds all these (potentially vodka-induced) loose ends really frustrating.

Candystand Brings Steve-O Out to Play

Candystand keeps us occupied through the night with a new ad featuring Steve-O of Jackass.

Watch Steve-O get buried in sand. We're kind of amused, but not as much as we were when he pierced his ass cheeks together.

Off the subject of Steve-O, how is it Candystand can push mojito flavoured gum but Cocaine gets castrated?