In one of the more interesting methods of attempting to illustrate the waning worth of newspaper advertising, a Gyro-created fake ad campaign for the Philadelphia Inquirer features the fictitious airline Derrie-Air which, in an effort to be carbon neutral (fuckin' buzzwords), promises to plant trees to offset the pounds of carbon its planes spew into the atmosphere.
Q: What's worse than hearing Kathy Lee Gifford say "Bling bling bling"?
A: Hearing a professional voice over artist say "Booyah for Boolean!" And you can thank Revenue Science for that little sphincter crunch you just did.
Ever see that puppet show Thunderbirds? Revel quietly while Brains, its token geek, rocks out to Rhythm is a Dancer for Drench bottled water. Tagline: "Brains perform best when they're hydrated."
(Technically speaking though, wouldn't a "Drenching" be bad for our little wooden friend?)
The spot sparked a passionate discussion on BBC's Ad Breakdown about whether Brains sold his soul to the "commercial puppet master" or is just having a "joyous moment." Also, a bunch of people don't get what a dancing Brains has to do with bottled water.
That's understandable; then again, I'm still trying to figure out how Cadbury's gorilla ad sold chocolate. The Consumer is a fickle animal.
It's sort of thoughtful that State Farm feels compelled to pander directly to both mainland Asians and Pacific Islanders.
The question I really want answered is, who left that rug in the middle of the driveway?
Via Gawker and Multicult Classics.
- Crocs launched a travel site, Cities by Foot. Designated Crocs-wearers explore cities like Denver, New Orleans, San Francisco and Vail. Every once in awhile you get a close-up shot of their feet.
- This guy travels to India to remedy his PC pop-up problem. Hijinks ensue. My favourite line: "Just tell them to unplug it, and PLUG IT AGAIN!" Cut to the song.
- Apparently 50 Cent is social media savvy.
- The British government tries scare tactics to keep kids away from knives. They also plan to give out postcards featuring mutilated body parts.
- A lonely man at wit's end has placed an ad offering $5,000 to any woman who agrees to marry him. Desperate much?
- Choice of scarf gets Dunkin' Donuts ad yanked. Next, ad gets yanked because someone called a car black instead of "absence of color." WTF?
George Parker dukes it out with AgencySpy's new guy over the use of swear words and anonymity issues.
- With make-your-own spoof ads and a Learn How to AdSpeak, Australia's The Gruen Transfer might become what Firebrand didn't.
- A New York City cat sitter bitches about being sent a HUGE t-shirt from the Humane Society and how all these marketing pieces are just a waste of charitable donations.
Design agency Sharp Communications is using temporary tattoos to promote how it "seamlessly blends HIGH OCTANE CREATIVE THOUGHT WITH BLUE CHIP STRATEGIC RIGOR." (Yeah, it was written just like that.)
The tats are objectively horrible. See the other two in the text below.
Guided by the belief that everything should taste like bacon, two whimsical dreamers named Justin and Dave launched a product called Bacon Salt. Flavors come in Original, Hickory, Peppered and Natural. Buy it here.*
If you're not sold by its merits, check out Operation Bacon Salt, a patriotic effort to bring the comforting flavor of bacon to American soldiers overseas. Bacon Salt's blog keeps readers updated on Operation Bacon Salt and, as a bacony, salty bonus, provides health news and sassy Bacon Salt recipes.
Also -- also!!! -- there are shirts!
This is what the American Dream is all about. (Well, this and girl-on-girl roller derby.) Thanks blood and milk for the tip.
For people that are bored with the power struggle between the charismatic black man and the woman who'll pursue her ambition to the ends of our patience, some relief is circulating the 'net today:
- Why choose if you can combine? (via MarketingProfs)
- Obama, Clinton fight it out jedi-style
And in other (actual) news...
- Obama and McCain have begun seeking VPs. (Well, that's what the story suggests. Obama, for the record, said, "I am not commenting on vice presidential matters, because I have not won this nomination.")
- McCain cuts ties with the Hitler pastor.
- Clinton beats McCain ... at a vodka competition. Four years ago.
- I thought this Meth Minute video would be a wacky cartoon about abusing methamphetamines. But it was just a reel of complaint calls.
- Oprah's Angel Network and Free the Children have formed the O Ambassadors project, which "encourages young leaders to dream."
- MoveOn wages war against Pastor John Hagee, who said Adolf Hitler was a God-sent hunter of Jews. Hagee is one of McCain's "key backers," and McCain is currently MoveOn's pet project.
- Chevy considers how impractical a dancing car would be.
- Yahoo offers an under-the-table paid program where you provide the description ad copy for the ORGANIC RESULTS of your website. And it'll only cost you TWENTY CENTS per click. This is because Yahoo's spiders might fail to properly process your SEO efforts. Little wonder Jolie O'Dell calls it "frikkin criminal." (We second the motion.)