In a witty ploy for press, Taco Bell, unlike other fast food brands who have derided Nationwide's depiction of the fast food career as less than desirable, has offered a job to Kevin Federline and the promise of a customized Taco Bell uniform. Taco Bell CEO Greg Creed sent this offer letter:
Dear Mr. Federline,
First off, congratulations on your upcoming Super Bowl ad. We heard it's generating a lot of talk, particularly about working in the fast food industry.
We know you respect those who work in our business. In fact, last year you said in an interview, "My kids are going to have to learn what a real job is, what life is. You don't have it easy with me. Period. My kids are going to work at Taco Bell."
We're flattered, but obviously they're too young to work for us. So here's our offer to you: Come work for us, just for a one hour shift. We'll get you a uniform, a custom name tag and show you what a great place Taco Bell is to work. We'll even reward customers who visit that restaurant with an order of our new Carne Asada Steak Grilled Taquitos for free.
We encourage you to continue to "Think Outside the Bun" and hope you accept our tasty offer.
Taco Bell Corp.
Now, that's the kind of marketing think we respect and appreciate.
OK, so this isn't exactly a Super Bowl ad but it's kinda fun. Adrants reader Benjamin George tells us it's a "parody of the 1985 Chicago Bears' Super Bowl Shuffle with Yogi, Boo Boo, Smokey, Pooh, and other cartoon bears." For anyone that was around in 1985, we suppose it'll bring back some memories. Or nightmares. Called Super Bear Shuffle, it was created by Big Game Hunters.
We're not sure whether to laugh at or be concerned for Boston which got quite angry with Turner Broadcasting's for its ten city publicity stunt which, over the past two weeks, placed circuit board-like devices throughout each city, including Boston, to promote the the company's Cartoon Network Adult Swim Aqua Teen Hunger Force. Wednesday, all hell broke loose in the city of Boston when a commuter noticed one of the devices under a highway overpass above Sullivan Sqaure Station in Charlestown.
Bomb squads were called. Subways were shut down. Traffic was diverted. Newly seated Massachusetts Governor Deval Patrick said, "It's a hoax and it's not funny." Boston Mayor Thomas Menino threatened legal action. All because a few promotional items were placed around the city.
A source points us to a UK trend of snippy little domestica ads showcasing women acting out the spectrum of nasty human emotions for love of a product. The ads run along the same undercurrent: antagonists have a quality about them that's shared by kids who get in trouble long after 3rd-grade because they still haven't learned to share. (We know what happens to those kids. They grow up to be amazingly magnetic sex gods and goddesses who write ad news for a living.)
A couple of illustrative ads include this one for Toyota Yaris, where a woman passive-aggressively crashes her boyfriend's plane after he kicks the door shut on her car; and this creepy Quorn one where a girl with a fork acts out over health food.
If this is any indication of quietly growing womens' sentiments in the UK, we're disinclined to visit anytime soon, particularly if there are forks nearby. Feel free to send in more of the same or an explanation if you happen to have one.
Here's a Russian vodka commercial that releases all that pent up, iron curtain crap the country had to endure for so long. Like a 16 year old kid returning from a week spent on vacation with the family to the privacy of his own room to urgently release thats week's "build up," Russian marketers are undergoing a release of their own. In this commercial for Kreslova vodka, a lonely Russian man's imagination drifts to the pleasures of beautiful woman clad in nothing more than tiny thongs and cleavage-enhancing lingerie. And it's all the vodka's fault. Damn. Where can we get some of that imagination-enhancing vodka here in the states?
You know those casual-sounding recorded calls that say you should refi your house? Now you too can act like you don't have time to make calls yourself.
Eidoserve presents Abby Me, who does all the dirty work for you. Punch in the number of who you want to call and write a whimsical message. Seconds later a pleasant but eerie female voice will call the receiver from your number and repeat what you scribbled out. It's sure to irritate everyone you know and make you feel more important than you are.
Abby makes good with simple phrases like "Hello, I want to have your babies" but not so well with $10 words like "Supercalifragilisticexpialidoceous." Well, an assistant who at least tries to convey nonsense with a straight face is always a keeper. Best of all, she doesn't charge anything. Why can't most interns be that awesome?
This Spanish ad for the latest Got Milk? campaign brings us to an island where everyone giggles all day. The laughs and smiles get attributed to milk, toted as a magic salve for strong white teeth.
We were told this ad is funny but mostly we were confused, due no doubt in part to the fact that nobody at Adrants speaks Spanish. We watched it seven times and it didn't get any funnier. In fact, by now we're feeling a little bummed.
We considered getting some milk in order to feel less bummed, because, you know, there's tannin in it, but then we thought, doesn't vodka do almost the same thing?
What exactly is this ad saying? I have breasts so I'm not smart enough to read The Economist? I show a lot of cleavage so I don't have to be smart to get what I want? I wear a Wonderbra so every man is at my beck and call? I'm a stupid female that thinks my breasts are more powerful than my brain? OK, maybe that last one's kinda true for some but still. Perhaps Linda Foster is just so cool for wearing a Wonderbra that intelligence like The Economist are just beneath her. Maybe the Wonderbra is so effective it makes her breasts so huge see can't see over them to read the magazine. Please. Explain this ad to us.
We are so sick of all this Julie Roehm crap. Oh wait. No we're not. Are you kidding? Of course we're not. This is great shit to write about. So now she's suing Wal-mart for breach of employment contract and demanding the return of certain files and items from her office such as paint and a step ladder she left in her office. Aside from all the boring legal crap, perhaps the best line in the entire Advertising Age article about this latest chapter in the saga is, "Among the changes Ms. Roehm effected during her 11-month tenure at Wal-Mart: She painted her office." Classic. Priceless. Hilarious.
While she has concerns over what she believes is money owed her according to her contract, when she appeared today at a panel on the worth of Super Bowl advertising, she said her Wal-Mart dismissal was a "blessing." Certainly a strange comment to make on the eve of issuing a lawsuit against the employer that delivered that "blessing." Oh whatever, so the saga continues, wasting bit and bytes off online press space and killing trees all to regurgitate the same old crap: she wasn't a fit for Wal-Mart and they canned her ass. Get over it. Move on.
For all you perverts out there. Oh wait. Sorry. That's just us. And maybe the dude over at Where's my Jetpack who had some fun playing with Land O Lakes butter. No, not the product you sickos. The packaging. Apparently way bakc in the 30's, the designer of the packaging, Jess Betlach thought he'd have some fun by adding the visual hint or female aureola/nipple to the Indian woman's knees. The knees, you ask? Well, according the Where's My Jetpack, thousands of boys would cut the knees off, cut a whole where the Indian woman is holding the product and insert the image of the knees thus creating the illusion of an Indian woman holding her bare breasts.
Remember, this was before Playboy. Before Juggs. Before the Internet. Before National Geographic, perhaps. Apparently, a guy had to so what he had to do to get his daily moment of satisfaction. Humorously, Where's My Jetpack promises to post Land O Lakes' cease and desist when it arrives.