A site called Things Real People Don't Say About Advertising include such gems as "Of course I'll spend 8 minutes of my life watching your branded content," "Cool! A banner ad!", "You know what I could go for? A mini-site that requires all of my computer's processing power" and "Fuck Yeah I'll Join the Conversation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
When you step back and take a look at the advertising industry and it's propensity to toss around buzz words and create things only those in the industry could love, it's not surprising these reactions are exactly the sort off things people, despite the industry's best efforts, would never say.
- With GeoTrust, security never looked so hot. Or repulsive depending upon which button you click.
- The New York Daily News has put together a collection of 98 ads which feature celebrities sharing lots and lots of skin.
- Microsoft has placed it's $1 billion media business into review. May the best shark win.
- On Tuesday, January 11 at 7PM at the Museum of Modern Art, The One Show will host an event to honor the best digital work of the past decade. You can view the winners here.
- SNL funnyman Bill Hader dedicates his wry best to figuring out everything you'd ever want to know about a Volkswagen in these spots on the VW Academy channel from Deutsch LA, directed by Jake Szymanski with Caviar Los Angeles.
Well, first of all, girls have been wearing pajamas to class for years. But, we're not talking about that style of pajama. No. We're talking Pajama Jeans, a pair of pants that's supposed to look like jeans but feel as comfortable as your favorite pajamas.
And what's a goofy product like that without a goofy infomercial to go along with it? Well, that's what we have for you here. The new pajama sensation! That look like designer jeans! With smooth butt-lifting design! They're like a sexy second skin!
Yes, ladies, don't struggle trying to pull your inflexible jeans up over your curvaceous ass. Run right over to the Pajama Jeans website and snag yourself a pair of forgiving Pajama Jeans. Your ass will thank you.
In yet another stretch, a Dutch Axe commercial tries to convince us its fragrance is so alluring it causes angels (the hottest, of course) to fall from the sky and smash their halos. Conceivably because they'd rather live a terrestrial life with an Axe spraying idiot rather than the heavenly life of the divine.
More likely, it's the overbearing stench of the stuff that's caused them to momentarily lose their balance in the clouds.
By now most of you have probably seen the T-Mobile myTouch 4G commercial called New Ride which apes Apple's I'm A Mac campaign. It's the one where the Hot Chick (naturally) tells the doofus (naturally) on a scooter her network is faster than his.
What you probably don't know, or don't care about...let's be honest here, is Paris Hilton was seen a couple of days ago at a photo shoot sporting a near exact replica of the skin tight body suit the T-Mobile Hot Chick wears in the commercial. The only difference, as compared to the more buttoned up T-Mobile Hot Chick, being the enormous quantity of visible cleavage bursting forth from within the confines of Hilton's suit as it strains to contain her bulging dirigibles
Fluke? Subliminal stealth marketing? Lucky break for T-Mobile? We can only wish. But, no. She's reportedly launching a motorcycle racing team.
And, yes. You would stare too.
In celebration of the wondrous oddities that find their way into advertising's creativity, we'd like to highlight some of the year's strangest ads. We've got guys cleaning their faces with their balls, a sneaker firmly planting itself in a giant, fake ass, wrist cutting that's dubbed sexy, a para-sailing donkey, Canadians barfing pink paint, a spanking fetish fueled by a love for sneakers, roller coaster facials, a wandering bladder, a golfer with his head up his ass and school girls who love to smell each others fingers
1. Guys, Would You Wipe Your Face With Your Balls?
2. Muscular Man Boobs Scare Up Planet Fitness Membership
3. Family Sells Itself to Advertisers
4. Diesel Sticks Giant Sneaker Up Giant Ass
5. Summer's Eve Says Douche Before You Ask For A Raise
This one falls squarely into the "so bad it's good" category. Having some fun with people' social media obsessions, the UK's Drybrook & District Male Voice Choir and Renegade Media have created Please Retweet to the tune of Englebert Humperdinck's Please Release Me. It's to raise money for The Meningitis Trust and all your favorites are there from Facebook to Twitter to MySpace and more.
So do like the choir asks and retweet this post!
Here's a couple of twisted holiday spots SapientNitro created for Footlocker. In one, a son, who looks way too old to still be living at home, is holding one of Santa's reindeers for ransom unless he gets his favorite pair of kicks from Footlocker. In another, Sanata is chastised for lusting after a pair of sneakers under the tree. He's asked to leave without getting his milk and cookies.
Both spots are a welcome distraction from the cutely overloaded annual pantheon of sicky sweet advertising we see each year.
You've got to hand it to Lawson Clarke. The dude has absolutely no fear of putting himself out for ridicule. Who the hell is Lawson Clarke? He's the dude who, last year, paid homage to the famed Burt Reynolds spread as part of his job search. If you thought that was creepy enough, wait until you see him in this Funny or Die video in which he celebrates Christmas every day for an entire year. The ending is not pretty.
We've also got to hand it to his wife who co-stars in the film. Any woman who can allow herself to be associated with a man like Lawson is an amazing woman in our book!
Happy holidays, Clarkes.
Like cats? Hate war? Then you'll love this quirky new work from john st. for War Child Gifts, an organization that allows people to purchase gifts for children of war-torn families. It's not the most direct sell approach we've seen but it is one of the oddest. And we like odd. Because odd is different. Odd is good. And saying the word odd over and over and over again makes a paragraph long enough to wrap around the image that accompanies this story because, well, there isn't much else to say about this campiagn other than, well, it's odd. And we like odd. And...OK...we'll stop now.