An hour or so ago I read a grisly article about some Russian kids that killed and ate their goth friends. After scrolling down to the end of the piece and feeling appropriately perturbed, I came across the Ask.com video ad at left.
"How can you learn to walk in high heels?" it burbles cheerfully. "Get the answer." I played the video out of morbid curiosity and watched a pair of legs walk, with sass, up until the grand finale -- when the owner of those legs topples over with a scream, followed by cries of dismay.
It remains unclear whether she was eaten after her plummet from grace.
Think the Brits are stuffy? You don't know the half of it. See a bunch of disgruntled British housewives protest against a man accused of "polygameat" -- the practice of eating more than one meat in a burger.
By Crispin Porter + Bogusky for Burger King's Meat Beast Whopper. Sorta reminds me of that meatatarian thing Wendy's is promoting.
Ohmigosh. Is flesh-eating finally cool again? Because I could use some gazelle, garnished with pepperoni and a side of fried chicken strips. Dipped in lamb's blood.
In installment 2 of Microsoft's avant-garde repositioning extravaganza, Bill Gates and Jerry Seinfeld try the simple life.
Imagine it: two rich dudes, bunking in with a family straight out of Little Miss Sunshine. It's almost like when Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie lived on a farm, except more weird than entertaining.
But maybe I'm just reacting to the malicious geriatric.
Check out the "new face of divorce." FirstWivesWorld.com aspires to be the go-to social network for divorcees -- or women that expect to be divorced soon.
The site is chock-full of social media distraction, like blogs and videos from other casualties of wedlock. And like jilted partners trying with vigor to keep their outlooks sunny-side-up, desperately gleeful headlines shout, "A Single, Liberating Act: Reclaiming My Maiden Name" and "Divorce is the Best Thing Ever, Says Kate Hudson"!
But there are also practical lessons, like an old-fashioned schooling on the meaning of "honeytrap" and -- finally! -- a near-solid response to that irresistible question: do men have an infidelity gene? (Apparently some do.)
It's like the '50s! 2.0. With the most crucial difference being that while you drink alone, your charmingly redecorated home will ring with the slightly-delayed warmth and pixellated cheer of spankin' new digital chums.
Still perplexed? See video tutorial on why First Wives World exists.
Some chick sent us an email just dripping with faux indignation. It was all, "Have you seen this site? There hasn't been anything so demeaning to women in the history of the internet!" Don't be a tease, honey, just say it: DEAR ADRANTS, PLEASE WHORE ECKO MFG.
And boy is it worthy. The job ECKO MFG tries accomplishing, with almost cheesy earnestness, is stirring drama over Ecko's "SEXIST!!!" manufacturing practices: bikini-clad women stitching jeans together. It could be The Stepford Sweatshop -- if Connecticut were ruled by frat boys and not WASPs.
- Copyranter calls it quits. Again. Don't worry, he'll still be writing for Animal New York, and he's open to sponsorship.
- Speaking of sponsorship, HBO whips out some wad for web celebs like lonelygirl15. The network is rounding up YouTube headliners for a web series called Hooking Up. Witness the lameness.
- Degourget doesn't like Esquire's first-ever digital magazine cover, which was sponsored by the "ugly-assed Ford Flex." The price we pay for bells and whistles.
- Clear Channel Radio hosted an event called Stripped, where artists play "stripped-down" versions of songs in a jammy "unplugged" setting. Why is this news? Because Miley Cyrus performed Girls Just Wanna Have Fun, that's why. Everything involving Miley Cyrus is news, especially when the headline reads "MILEY CYRUS STRIPPED."
Every country's culture is different from another's but Japan's always has an enjoyable bit of quirk to it which, like any country's culture, makes itself quite evident in its commercials. In this ad from the Japanese Dairy Council, a chalk fight of epic proportion breaks out between a student and a teacher.
Sadly, if this sort of spot was attempted in America, some cause group would rise up and cry inappropriate student/teacher interaction! Too Violent! To...who knows but they's come up with something.
To promote his circumcision business on a shoestring budget, Ismet Dural of Istanbul, Turkey prepared the tear sheets at left. More photos here.
It's so deliciously creepy. Not only do you get to casually circumcise, you can carry the fruit of that labor in your pocket all afternoon long.
To facilitate the all-online launch of Kit Kat Cookies & Cream (on the record: yuck), Nestle got into bed with JWT/Sydney and RMG Connect to conceive Hans Fagerlund, whom they describe as "a cross between Jack Black and Will Ferrell."
That's some fucked-up cross-breeding.
Our little freak Hans is also a Chunga Champion, Chunga being the art of stacking Cookies and Cream Kit-Kats with his bare hands. Seriously. It's Jenga! With calories!
At first I thought the thing at left was a snail. But no, it was an amorous man with a French horn for a head. (Tagline: "Seeing and hearing like never before.")
This is part of a print campaign for Pioneer's KURO line of TVs and audio-video gear. Put together by TBWA\CHIAT\DAY\Los Angeles, each ad depicts a person in some state of metamorphosis, which represents the emotional heights your entertainment system should be helping you reach. Variants include butterfly girl, road carnage, trumpet man deux and trois. (But where is The Fly?)
Weird, but nice to look at. AdFreak observes the stuff Pioneer did last year was "even odder," and a lot less pretty.