Dear Chuck McBride,
Assuming you had a hand in its creation, we just watched your Cow Gives Birth to a Guy commercial in which, yes, a cow gives birth to a guy...wearing Ray-Bans and we're, well, disgusted. No wait, freaked out. No wait, astonished. No wait, horrified. No wait, laughing out loud. No wait, what? We have no idea.
Fake sunglass tossing videos are one thing. This thing falls into an entirley different category. OMFG, we're calling the SPCA. Or is it PETA? Or is it NICFA? NDFA? ADA? DFA?
Surely someone's gonna have a problem with a 6'2" guy getting extricated from a mommy cow! Oh wait, that's it. The manure storm is about to hit! Mommy Cow Bloggers are gonna be all over your ass about this one!
A Humanitarian Lion supporter produced a video riffing off Burger King's Whopper Virgins campaign, where documentarians engage Third World inhabitants in hamburger taste tests -- and incidentally pop their hamburger-free cherries.
Unlike Burger King's ad footage, which makes backwater village life look exotic and friendly, the pro-Humanitarian Lion video uses images of abject poverty to illustrate "Whopper Virgins," followed by Nike Virgins, Playstation Virgins, Perrier Virgins and Human Rights Virgins.
The push point: "Millions of people cannot enjoy the world. Why not use our creativity and power to help them once a year?" A link to the Humanitarian Lion website wraps it up.
Poignant if lengthy. If nothing else, it illustrates the crassness of imposing Whoppers and Big Macs on people with bigger voids to fill.
OK so Tom Dickson has been hyping his Blendtc blender in online videos for some time now. They are, as expected, just as cheesy as old school Ronco and K-tel commercials. To prove blending strength, Tom tosses all sorts of things into the blender; avocados, an iPhone, a rake, sneakers, a Rubik's cube, Mario Kart and plastic sports cars.
It's all pretty stupid. But it's all pretty smart too. Well, if you can equate YouTube views with sales, that is.
For two years, Tom's been tossing all manner of matter into his blender. If one follows the "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" school of thought, it's a fair fair bet his videos are paying off.
View all of the inanity here.
A wee Brooklyn-based shop called Fantasy Trophies ("Hand-made trophies worth bragging about") has launched a YouTube campaign, "Bragging Rites," that consists of nine videos which get progressively more retarded.
The videos follow Brian, a brash, furry office cog, who antagonizes his fantasy football opponents. It's profoundly working-man-tastic; probably only funny for the people involved, and maybe for people that have done crazy shit in the name of fantasy football. If you fall into neither camp, well, tough luck.
See Penis Cake and/or Megan's Strap-On Fantasy. (Megan ultimately gets revenge in the form of a really feeble "email this asshole!" video. Girl, you'll shimmy into a strap-on, but broadcasting dude's email on YouTube was your best take on vengeance? You put bad-ass bitches to shame.)
Australian hip-hop artist Al Bino (um, right) is out with a video entitled It's A Beautiful Day for Cancer. It's sexy. It's weird. It's gross. It's funny.
Produced by Lyrics Born, the video, according to the Lyrics Born website, was created for an "Australian skin cancer benefit project."
It appears the video has been successfully seeded across sites such as YouTube, Break, AOL, Current, Dailymotion, Buzznet and several others. On YouTube, the video, which was posted December 11, has seen 22, 798 views. Views on other seeded sites don't add up to much.
This holiday, Brew Creative decided to forego that "we're donating to charity!" crap that other agencies are doing and cut right to the good stuff. Here's a mash-up of all the depressing political soundbytes we were all subjected to this year.
If nothing else, let this knowledge fill your heart: our government makes so many warped promises that our interests are bound to be met at least some of the time, so keep right on coasting along and eating bacon.
Probably the best thing about this effort is the ability to sift through a broad array of disconnected soundbytes and make your own "message of hope." Politico quotables are divided between "Phrases" and "Connecting words." Good times.
Mashup features provided with help from Sevnthsin.
- Top 10 virals of '08, courtesy of the guys that brought you this.
- Digitas Health donates to charity for the holidays, as does RAZ PR (which told us via paper card). Meanwhile, comScore pledges trees.
- "Unprecedented economic waters" (nice euphemism!) means no FedEx retardation during '09's Super Bowl. One less thing to look forward to. Honestly, anything involving Burt Reynolds makes us happier people.
- Remember that crazy/beautiful, semi-schizophrenic media orgy titled Game, Game, Game and Again Game? The sequel is called I Made This. You Play This. We Are Enemies. Creator Jason Nelson promises "More strange hand drawn creatures, with screen shot anchored levels and all the poetic bits known." And then we kissed him.
- Crowdsourcing horror.
- Beancasting Steve and Bill. Among other things, they talk online video marketing, Pepsi suicide ads and diversity (lack of?) in the industry.
- Learn to shred with CP+B. "But yeah, the biggest thing people will go after is Alex giving lessons on how to play Extreme's More Than Words." Sounds like a winner to me.
Oh screw it. There's no real news this week anyway (other than DDB making the dramatic discovery a work week is 40 hours) so here's yet another holiday card. As with most work in this industry, it's not original. But that doesn't necessarily make it bad. Or good. In this case, we can't decide.
First Round Capital put together a video that highlights all the companies it works with. Sounds boring? Sure. But, if you've ever seen the Matt Harding's Where the Hell is Matt dancing videos, you'll recognize this one immediately.
As to whether or not it's good, one could argue the former because, well, getting supposedly serious business people to do a stupid dance is funny. One could also argue the latter in that the unofficial idea behind the Matt Harding videos - that a simple dance can bring the world's people together in peace - is tastelessly trashed here by a company whose sole purpose is to give cash to companies so they can make even more cash.
Oh look, It's Trailer Crashers with new clothes on. Yes, Samsung is out with Rumble in the Jingle, a Christmas-themed, make-your-own-movie-trailer thing to promote...um..."awareness of the company's Blu Ray offerings."
Gotta love how the three star's "headgear" kind floats awkwardly above their faces. The (intended?) cheesiness succeeds (sort of).
Seriously? Levi's is *still* pumping out these ludicrously fake videos? And we're still watching them? And writing about them?
Hmm. Guess ludicrously fake is still a viable strategy.