Quarterlifer Angst, Alicia Keys, Used to Sell Deodorant

Dove is using the (apparently) drama-rich life of Alicia Keys to appeal to women in their 20s. Dove Go Fresh and MTV give you "Fresh Takes," a heavily promoted series about three girlfriends figuring shit out while looking pretty (an acquired skill).

Hrm. Think Crossroads would've been better received if it was less about Britney Spears and more about pastel deodorants? Somebody at Camp Dove must have thought so.

Under Armour Goes Pink, Allegedly for Breast Cancer, But Really for the XX Vote

Under Armour is looking for three women to become the faces of its 2008 Power in Pink effort. In addition to using their faces to inspire others, Under Armour will also share their stories of courage and survival from breast cancer.

The winners get an all-expense paid trip to Baltimore -- no, not the Bahamas, Baltimore -- where, when not dodging bullets, they'll be photographed and interviewed.

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Calling All Stillborn Ad Ideas! Your Time is Now

Raging Artists wants the ad ideas your boss already told you to bury, along with your dignity and the ugly easter eggs that the children didn't want. On a roll? Good for you. Join the Speckies too.

Stressed About College Funds -- or Just Your College Kid? Shoot Both Into Orbit

NorthWestern has expanded -- or further limited, depending on one's viewpoint -- its Wreck Your Worries campaign. On Let Your Worries Go, the result of a partnership with Firstborn Multimedia (sacrifice yours today!), users can select from a limited set of personified worries and shoot them into orbit, launch them into the sky, propel them over land, or bury them underwater.

When you're done watching your self-imposed antagonists glide peacefully away, the Northwestern Mutual Foundation will commit to donate to a cause that addresses your worry. The more times your worry is picked between now and December 31, the more money they'll put toward it.

Here's a worry-easing suggestion. How about you guys fund our retirement? With social security shot down, we could use the love.

Coke Brings Out Your Inner Egalitarian ... and If We Were You, We'd Stuff it Back In

The ads are French and they debut on the 26th of this month.

The tagline: "Avec Coca-Cola, on parle tous football," which translates to something like "With Coca-Cola, everyone speaks football," which is a roundabout way of saying Coca-Cola makes football buddies of unlikely pairs.

That's sweet and all. But we wouldn't embrace a brain-eating dead guy, or a head-smashing toy, or a displaced octopus for any refreshing beverage. If that's prejudice then we are guilty as charged, and happy to be thirsty.

Claussen Pickles Quench Oral Desires

If you prefer things stiffly erect and throbbing with fullness rather than things that are flaccidly limp and not up for anything fun then, according to this ad, Claussen is your brand of pickle. Why mess with a tired, spent pickle when you can have one that's ready to forcefully explode in your mouth with an orgasm of juicy flavor quenching your desire for spunky girth?

Hypnotism Helps Eliminate Focus Group "Group Think'

Writing in Brandweek, Kenneth Hein takes a look at Ero RSCG's use of hypnotism in focus groups for client Volvo. Following a test drive, focus group members were hypnotized with the goal of obtaining their true reactions to the car versus the usually clouded opinions offered by most focus group members.

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Grab Your Bikinis Girls! 'Cosmo' Wants Your Body on the Beach!

If you're into girls wearing bikinis - 1200 of them - you might want to head to Nikki Beach in Miami on April 18. And if you are a girl, Cosmopolitan is looking for 1200 of you 18-34 who are willing to hang out with 1,200 other women dressed in bikinis for a photos shoot which, Cosmo hopes, will break Guinness World Records for the most people photographed on a beach. The current record is 1,000.

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Powerlines: How Reagan Won Hearts and De Beers Made a Monopoly

We just finished reading Powerlines: Words That Sell Brands, Grip Fans, and Sometimes Change History, by CMO Steve Cone of Epsilon. (The one with the specs and the grimace.) It's a survey of propaganda that probably helped color the landscape of your life. The last chapter has tips on creating a powerline -- not a guaranteed formula, but still good stuff to keep in mind.

People exposed to an ad will probably pass judgment on it based on the visual and the most visible print. (Typically that's the tagline.) Ad-heads spend plenty of time on pictures, but few consider what impact a resonant string of words can deliver.

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That 'Banned' Wendy's Commercial Continues to Spread

In case you haven't seen it (though it's a year old so maybe you have), here's the "banned" Wendy's Spicy Chicken Sandwich commercial it's creator claims he created but was not approved by the client. He says Wendy's has nothing to do with it but we're sure they're quietly smiling over the video's growing popularity.