OMG! You Have Dork Cling.


It's Dork Dodge! In this RPG game by JC Penney, you're a college girl trying to leave the dorm, where a hot but insecure love interest is waiting. Your job: to emotionally castrate the losers in your way. (Attacking them with items from Penney's Dorm Life line is usually a safe bet.) "Losers" labeled by Penney's include -- but are not limited to -- an incest-friendly hick, a Swedish exchange student, a bodybuilder and a goth.

Don't be too gentle or they'll follow you (dork cling!), thereby destroying your chances of a tasty hook-up forever. In that case, your best option is to ask a friend for help. (Oddly, the friends are as douchey as the men.) And don't dally too long or Mister Bouquet-of-Flowers out there will ditch yo' ass. (He's on a very tight schedule.)

But aww, it's the tech era, and some of these squares are cute. My favourite pick-up line: "Did you know 'NERD' stands for Never-Ending Rendezvous ... with Destiny? Look it up."

Put together by EVB San Francisco. If for some odd reason you're now into the Penney's Dorm Life line, see Facebook page. I just love me a furry pink picture frame.

by Angela Natividad    Jul-28-08   Click to Comment   
Topic: Brands, Campaigns, Games, Online, Promotions   

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Posted by: Lisa on July 28, 2008 8:12 PM

I think it's great that JC Penney has invented a game where girls are encouraged to ditch losers so they can be tramps with other guys. This will prepare them mightily for their future lives as divorcees.

JC Penney is always thinking up really great ideas like this to divert attention from their crappy merchandise that no self-respecting harlot would wear to anything. Not that these chick wear clothes for long anyway.

Hopefully, JC Penney has the integrity to show the nerds wearing their merchandise. That's why they're nerds, you know.

Posted by: 1Letterman on July 28, 2008 8:37 PM

Holy crap. That's about the stupidest f#@%ing thing I've ever seen Hey JC, since it seems you like to wipe your ass with $100 bills, I'm heading to Vegas this weekend I can drop it all on black for you.

Posted by: Edward on July 28, 2008 9:42 PM

This is such a silly idea that I had to write an ode to it in Dr. Seuss rhyme!

Posted by: Jonathan Salem Baskin on August 11, 2008 9:01 AM