Milk Saves Princesses from Bitchiness and Spinsterhood

Who needs Disney when you've got the California Milk Processor Board? Watch with conviction renewed how two princes-to-be win royal mates.

o One, by calming the tragic storms of PMS

o The other, by taming her Medusa hair

...all with ice-cold glasses of milk.

What a charming world we live in. This subtle reinforcement of fairy-tale values brought to you by agency Grupo Gallegos and the fine artisans at Psyop.