Crunch Wraps Equal-Opp Arms Around Pop Stereotypes
For the "We All Crunch" campaign, Mother New York throws together an amalgamation of typical (but special!) Crunch regulars that defy the gym-obsessed bodybuilder stereotype characteristic of oh, say, Gold's.
We dig the no-nonsense grimacey grrr on Nancy at left.
• Nancy: 68-years-old, deaf in one ear, is a demon in the boxing ring
• Bruce: 35-year-old "nice guy" bartender, loves his mom, has a thing for showtunes
• Mercedes: 26-year-old outspoken, high-maintenance girl, who knows she has it going on
• Rod: 39-year-old high-stress investment banker, always cutting a deal, serious about everything
• Beth: 24-year-old brooding, book-loving, Smiths record-collecting goth girl
• Gene: 33-year-old ex-tour manager for a metal band, found serenity in yoga
• Steven: 32-year-old "action guy," competitive, loves the rush of the rush
We're not sure what "the rush of the rush" is, but it sounds windy.
The Crunchers will be making appearances on traditional and Web media. Each ad includes cute little taglines like "Mercedes likes to keep her butt round, like a grapefruit" and "Gene traded in heavy metal for light-weight sweat pants," alongside the "We All Crunch" theme.
The personifications seem about right but they've forgotten the balding European man with the faded shirt marked Delicioso! and the sweaty balls encased in tight purple Spandex. You know, the one who does yoga poses in the weight room all the time.
Oh wait. We don't go to Crunch. In fact, we're not members of any gym. Where did that mental image come from?