Time Warner Cable Kills Band's Career With Horrible Commercial

future86.jpg

We're hoping the geniuses behind this Time Warner 1-800-OKcable commercial knew, in advance, they were creating something fully intended to be "wink, wink, nudge, nudge, we know this is horrible but we're doing it anyway." We also hope the Tri-State band Future 86 was paid a whole lot of money for the privilege of never being taken seriously again.

by Steve Hall    Jun-21-07   Click to Comment   
Topic: Cable, Commercials, Strange, Worst   

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Comments



Comments

what the hell? if you stick a claim into a background lyric it doesnt have to be true??

DSL "nothing's faster"
TW HDTV "nothing's clearer"

i would think the FiOS guys would be pretty pissed. i know i am.

Posted by: as on June 21, 2007 1:26 PM

Are you f**king kidding me?!!! This is not sooo bad it's good. It's just horribly, horribly bad!

Posted by: Derek on June 21, 2007 1:29 PM

Oh, that is one of the most annoying and least-catchy jingles ever. At least the old Time-Warner song complaining about the girlfriend who spent all day talking on the phone to her mother in Puerto Rico was amusing. This band is just awful. Hard to believe that the singer in knee sox was ever taken seriously, though.

Posted by: annulla on June 21, 2007 1:31 PM

Once fine, twice fine... but they play that stupid commercial about 5000 times a day. The girl is cute, fine. I actually thought it was a made up band for TW.

Here are the issues, she tries to make out like it's the fastest internet (fios?), and if you sign up for the triple play package, you get the slow broadband.

While this one is bad due to the excessive times they play it, the "sir charge" commercial is even worse. They make out like verizon has 200 surcharges and then they basically say "we have a ton of charges too but you will understand ours!"

Posted by: Allen Stern on June 21, 2007 2:44 PM

Once fine, twice fine... but they play that stupid commercial about 5000 times a day. The girl is cute, fine. I actually thought it was a made up band for TW.

Here are the issues, she tries to make out like it's the fastest internet (fios?), and if you sign up for the triple play package, you get the slow broadband.

While this one is bad due to the excessive times they play it, the "sir charge" commercial is even worse. They make out like verizon has 200 surcharges and then they basically say "we have a ton of charges too but you will understand ours!"

Posted by: Allen Stern on June 21, 2007 2:44 PM

gee...i kinda like it in a totally stupefying way. but, on the other hand, i like the geico cavemen too ;-)

Posted by: elsie on June 21, 2007 11:13 PM

There were lyrics? All I could think about was her lip gloss. Then they cut to the bass player and I through the remote. The end is near.

Posted by: Hank on June 22, 2007 1:30 PM

I disagree wholeheartedly with the commenter who says the song isn't catchy--I can't get it out of my head!! And yes, there are lyrics. As I remember them:

Woke up this morning
Cable triple-play in my head!
Craving TV and Internet and phone (echo: and phone)
That's what I said!
High-speed internet--Nothing's faster!
HDTV--Nothing's clearer!
Cable digital phone so I can talk all day
I want it all!
1-800-OK-CABLE
I want it all!

Posted by: Ed on June 22, 2007 2:46 PM

Comcast excels at crappy commercials. At least they're steering away from "you're to stupid to install a dish" campaign.

Ed, very impressive.

Posted by: Carl on June 22, 2007 9:02 PM

Here's something scarier: the band's featuring the ad on their website. Ga!

http://www.future86music.com/home.html

Posted by: Carl on June 22, 2007 9:06 PM

god! that is......terrible! Who made this ridicuolous ad? It's some kind of disgusting.

Posted by: shakira8023 on June 22, 2007 11:59 PM

From the Future 86 Website:

Our latest album, appropriately titled "After Party", with crunchy power chords, bold choruses, and unforgettable melodies, topped off with a layer of commercial sheen, combines all the essential elements of Rock, Pop, and Punk, and makes it clear that Future 86 has an Appetite to Party which rivals Guns 'n Roses' Appetite For Destruction.

At their final gig, they should play this jingle and jack with the lyrics. What price, fleeting fame?

Farewell, Future 86.

Posted by: Jetpacks on June 25, 2007 11:47 AM

From the Future 86 Website:

Our latest album, appropriately titled "After Party", with crunchy power chords, bold choruses, and unforgettable melodies, topped off with a layer of commercial sheen, combines all the essential elements of Rock, Pop, and Punk, and makes it clear that Future 86 has an Appetite to Party which rivals Guns 'n Roses' Appetite For Destruction.

At their final gig, they should play this jingle and jack with the lyrics. What price, fleeting fame?

Farewell, Future 86.

Posted by: Jetpacks on June 25, 2007 11:54 AM

The have a... Canadian quality to their music. That eighties sound makes me nostalgic for my youth, but it's unlistenable today.

Posted by: tom on June 25, 2007 4:53 PM

It looks like the ad agency has their stooges out trying to salvage what little credibility this abomination has left - check out the the comments by Harls10 on YouTube. Then see that this account was created only a couple of days ago.
Will these fools never learn?

Posted by: Londoner on July 3, 2007 7:14 AM

What's Steve Halls beef with this commerical.
You ever heard of a remote Steve?
If you don't like something change the channel and stop bitching about some local NYC band that wants to make it in the big city and they were offered some tv spot.
I don't this will hurt the band at all, are you crazy with all this tv coverage everyday.
Sounds like sour grapes to me.
What do you do Steve hall, sit there and make commentaries about cable commericals..lol
I like the commerical and the chick and the band.
It's all bubble gum and what's wrong with that.
This is America after all.

Posted by: f on July 9, 2007 5:43 PM

What's Steve Halls beef with this commerical.
You ever heard of a remote Steve?
If you don't like something change the channel and stop bitching about some local NYC band that wants to make it in the big city and they were offered some tv spot.
I don't this will hurt the band at all, are you crazy with all this tv coverage everyday.
Sounds like sour grapes to me.
What do you do Steve hall, sit there and make commentaries about cable commericals..lol
I like the commerical and the chick and the band.
It's all bubble gum and what's wrong with that.
This is America after all.

Posted by: f on July 9, 2007 5:45 PM

What's Steve Halls beef with this commerical.
You ever heard of a remote Steve?
If you don't like something change the channel and stop bitching about some local NYC band that wants to make it in the big city and they were offered some tv spot.
I don't this will hurt the band at all, are you crazy with all this tv coverage everyday.
Sounds like sour grapes to me.
What do you do Steve hall, sit there and make commentaries about cable commericals..lol
I like the commerical and the chick and the band.
It's all bubble gum and what's wrong with that.
This is America after all.

Posted by: f on July 9, 2007 5:45 PM

What's Steve Halls beef with this commerical.
You ever heard of a remote Steve?
If you don't like something change the channel and stop bitching about some local NYC band that wants to make it in the big city and they were offered some tv spot.
I don't this will hurt the band at all, are you crazy with all this tv coverage everyday.
Sounds like sour grapes to me.
What do you do Steve hall, sit there and make commentaries about cable commericals..lol
I like the commerical and the chick and the band.
It's all bubble gum and what's wrong with that.
This is America after all.

Posted by: f on July 9, 2007 5:48 PM

What's Steve Halls beef with this commerical.
You ever heard of a remote Steve?
If you don't like something change the channel and stop bitching about some local NYC band that wants to make it in the big city and they were offered some tv spot.
I don't this will hurt the band at all, are you crazy with all this tv coverage everyday.
Sounds like sour grapes to me.
What do you do Steve hall, sit there and make commentaries about cable commericals..lol
I like the commerical and the chick and the band.
It's all bubble gum and what's wrong with that.
This is America after all.

Posted by: f on July 9, 2007 5:51 PM

UGH! I hate this commercial with a passion. I do change the channel when I see it coming on. The annoying ugly girl, the horrible voice and lyrics. It's AWFUL! Take it out NOW! I liked the last Cable commercial, now that was funny and catchy (still annoying, not quite like this one though). I HATE THAT BAND (I thought it was made up!) and I HATE THE LYRICS and the ANNOYING LEAD SINGER. KILL. HER. NOW. She's HORRIBLE!

Posted by: UGH! on July 10, 2007 11:23 AM

UGH! I hate this commercial with a passion. I do change the channel when I see it coming on. The annoying ugly girl, the horrible voice and lyrics. It's AWFUL! Take it out NOW! I liked the last Cable commercial, now that was funny and catchy (still annoying, not quite like this one though). I HATE THAT BAND (I thought it was made up!) and I HATE THE LYRICS and the ANNOYING LEAD SINGER. KILL. HER. NOW. She's HORRIBLE!

Posted by: UGH! on July 10, 2007 11:26 AM

the chick's kind cute... not as hot as biel or alba, but cute nonetheless...

but still, the commercial is horrible! i'm sure the band didn't write the song, Time Warner paid some crappy songwriter to do it for them...

i feel sorry for the band, and i'm willing to keep my mind open for them, when i see or hear them play something else thatn "i want it all", i'll judge them then...

and yes, you should see my cable guy's truck...

Posted by: Tiexandrea on July 11, 2007 4:01 PM

the chick's kind cute... not as hot as biel or alba, but cute nonetheless...

but still, the commercial is horrible! i'm sure the band didn't write the song, Time Warner paid some crappy songwriter to do it for them...

i feel sorry for the band, and i'm willing to keep my mind open for them, when i see or hear them play something else thatn "i want it all", i'll judge them then...

and yes, you should see my cable guy's truck...

Posted by: Tiexandrea on July 11, 2007 4:01 PM

the chick's kind cute... not as hot as biel or alba, but cute nonetheless...

but still, the commercial is horrible! i'm sure the band didn't write the song, Time Warner paid some crappy songwriter to do it for them...

i feel sorry for the band, and i'm willing to keep my mind open for them, when i see or hear them play something else thatn "i want it all", i'll judge them then...

and yes, you should see my cable guy's truck...

Posted by: Tiexandrea on July 11, 2007 4:02 PM

I stepped on my cat trying to rush and grab the remote to change the channel when this came on recently. Horrible. Almost a bad as "Hotel California" coming on when your alarm clock radio flips on in the AM. Could they put more crappy music genres in one song? And what is with that fucking turbo blast wind machine? She can barely keep her eyes open! Because of this commercial, I will stick with my sprint broadband card...

Posted by: achman on July 17, 2007 1:39 AM

You should see on YouTube: the pathetic excuse of a band is sitting there, creating all new identities (all from profiles created that day), telling everyone how "great" their band is, and how "hot" their lead singer is.

Guys, give it up. No one buys it. You suck.
And for the record: the lead singer is fat, ugly, and quite busted looking. Isn't 40 a little OLD to be playing "I wanna be a rockstar," dear?

Posted by: observer on July 21, 2007 7:16 AM

"I think it's high time for a rate increase!"

Posted by: jimz on August 2, 2007 7:31 AM