So someone sent us a message which read, "Not sure if you're the sensitive sappy type but here's a link to the extended version of a new TV campaign we just finished for Robbins Brothers Engagement Ring Stores."
OK so reading Adrants might not lead one to believe the people behind it (in this case, me) have anything but vindictive bones in their bodies but they would be wrong. Are we jaded? Yes. Are we temperamental? Yes. Are we unfairly bitchy from time to time? Yes. Are we like a playground will of wise ass little shits with nothing better to do that sling mud at one another and call each other names? Yes.
But, believe it or not, we are not insensitive and we are close to the biggest sap out there. After all, we cried during Sandra Bullock's film, The Proposal. Yes, we really did.
When you're cruising through your inbox to rid it of the few items your spam filter missed, pointless newsletters you never signed up for, Nigerian-style scams (which, sadly, still make their way through) and shockingly unrelated press releases and you stumble up one featuring an image of a woman bent over with her head in a box and wearing nothing more than heels, and underwear, you do sort of pause and wonder, "Huh? What the hell is this for?"
OK, that was a long sentence. Anyway, this email is from The Observer's Very Shop List and it's all about improving your summer wardrobe with a visit to Rue La La, a "a private two-day sales boutique of the most desirable designers at 30-80% off retail prices."
Have at it.
Last month inbound marketing firm HubSpot won a New England Direct Marketing Association Gold B2B award for its You Oughta Know About Inbound Marketing video. Now the firm, which specializes in doing everything that makes people come to marketers versus the other way around, is out with another video.
Created by HubSot's Rebecca Corliss, the video is called Baby Got Leads, And, yes, it is a Sir Mix-A-Lot rif but this one's got Sir Convert-A-Lot who gets sprung about things like targeted landing pages, offers, indexable blogs, podcasts, forms and organic leads.
Oh please, LG (and every other non-Apple phone maker). No matter how hard you try, how cute you attempt to be, how heavily you promote the Verizon app store (or whatever it's called) or how cool you try to make your uncool phones, you will never be the iPhone.
Now don't get all pissy with us claiming we're an iPhone snob. We don't even own one (yet) and we know it's not perfect. But, please. Please just admit you will never have the iPhone's cool factor and for God's sake stop trying to convince us with silly ads that you are anything but a boring touchscreen iPhone knock off.
Especially with silly Sesame Street-style silliness.
Arnold is out with another mock interview ad for the Truth campaign. In this entry, a seemingly immovable woman is subjected to the interviewers over-excited explanation of yet another business acronym. This one's AMPED or Articulate Motivated Passionate Energetic, which, clearly this woman is not.
The interviewer is amusingly animated. The woman is a dead fish. Perhaps due to years of suffering under the weight of her...oh that would be so rudely sexist to say! How dare we? Oh but wait. AdFreak got all sexist by suggesting just because the woman is wearing a "bust-accentuating" top, the ad is a bit NSFW. Huh?
So Tanqueray is out with a new W + K Amsterdam-created campaign that includes TV and outdoor and in the TV spots we see just how much goes into Tanqueray and and how all that muchness translates into the making of really good cocktails that cause tickle fights in the mouth of a man meeting an ex-girlfriend in Paris along with other friends who are too cool to visit the Eiffel Tower, the Mona Lisa or the Art du Triumph (or however you spell that) and how that's all about resisting the simple because, well, they drank Tangueray which, for some reason, caused them to appear in a commercial that's actually quite beautiful but just can't stop talking about how the ingredients in Tanqueray change people's behaviors like the guy who sneaks his way backstage and causes reviewers of advertising to write the world's longest run on sentence just to further define the essence of the campiagn so everyone can fully understand it so that when they go to the liquor store for gin their only choice will be Tanqueray and the only thing they'll do after drinking Tanqueray is fly to Paris and not visit the Eiffel Tower, the Mona Lisa or the Art du Triumph and, oops, we already said that but we're running out of things to say about this commercial except to note that if they did a :60 of this commercial, we'd need to continue this article over at AdFreak, AgencySpy or Adland because we'd run out of space but oh wait that's stupid because you can't run out of space online because, well, it's not like offline media which has finite printed space but that no one reads anyway because old media is dying and new new media is where it's at which makes this entire statement moot so here we are back talking about that Tanqueray commercial that has such amazing ingredients that it makes people do strange things like visit Paris and not visit the Eiffel Tower, the Mona Lisa or the Art du Triumph and, oops, we already said that but we're running out of things to say about this commercial except to note that...it's time to shut the fuck up about this fucking commercial.
If flying was actually this metaphysical, mundane details such as legroom and baggage check fees would be irrelevant. But, it's not and that's why this new work for Swiss Air leaves us with a big, "Huh?"
Created by Publicis Zurich, written and directed (and voiced) by Marc Forster ("Quantum of Solace," "Finding Neverland," "Monster's Ball") and edited by Cut + Run, the spot aims to describe "modern day travel via air.
Back in June, we noted The Hills babe Audrina Patridge would soon make her debut in a Carl's Jr. commercial. That day has arrived. In the commercial, we get to hear how Audrina has to give up "like everything" to look as hot as she does in a bikini. But the one thing she won't give up is the Carl's Jr. Teriyaki Burger with which she's "totally obsessed" and cuz, ya know, she has to be "a little bad."
While Barbara Lippert says she "appreciate(s) that it's a somewhat more natural setup than having Paris Hilton hose down a luxury car while sucking and licking the burger on all fours," we still think the Paris Hilton spot was the best Carl's Jr. commercial ever. Bikini + soapy water + famous socialite in her prime = gold.
Maybe it's our short attention span. Maybe it's our overly simplistic mind. Maybe it's our aversion to creative full of distracting hack job jumble cuts and irrelevant metaphors. Whatever it is, we had to watch these two DDB West-created, Epoch Films-produced Wells Fargo commercials a few times before we realized they touted the organization's online banking services and automatic savings programs.
Come one Epoch! You guys did that awesome JCPenney commercial. Granted you submitted it illegally to Cannes last year but still. Who got their hands on this Wells Fargo work? Your interns?
Hopping right on the "we'll do anything to increase ad revenue" bus, Entertainment Weekly is out with Andy's Richter Scale, an advertorial on the magazine's Must List page pimping the Conan O'Brien show, Andy Richter himself and HBO's True Blood. Wait, what's this ad for again?
Whatever the ad may be for, we love the riff on vampires which ends with, "And have you ever noticed that their real-life fans are ust renaissance fair types with substance abuse problems?"
As advertorials go, it's a good one. So good, it took us three days to realize it wasn't just an editorial sidebar to the Must List. But one wonders. Is that a good thing or a bad thing?