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Early today Advertising Age ripped into Starbucks for its Pike Place coupons and throwback cups (in stores for six weeks, a barista told us). All part of an ongoing attempt to rekindle stale sparks with a costly ($100 million) promotional campaign, which is looking more Grocery Chain -- and less Indie Cafe -- by the minute.
Once upon a time, I loved Starbucks more than my hypothetical Firstborn-to-Be. It'll take a lot more than a buttery homebrew and gaudy vouchers to rein in the trouble of a brand that's just become too commercial.
We love internal propaganda. The thing is, Microserf or otherwise, nobody feels this way about Vista. NOBODY. And if they did, they damn well wouldn't rock out like it's 1999.
I'm in the ad:tech press room watching this video (thanks, MTLB), and the guy next to me -- a writer for VentureBeat -- just burst out laughing. "I just finished watching that right now," he said. "Oh man. I need to go lie down."
Every time the room gets a little quiet, he starts laughing uncontrollably all over again.
Ugh. Watch some street hoods spray paint Zoo York's logo on roaches, then shower them onto people in the Manhattan business district.
And here, in a concept slightly more benign, one roach calls another a "no-good cocksucking piece of shit asshole douche."
Nice one. Gotta use it some time, possibly on one of the bustier interns. And in other news, what the fucking-fuck-FUCK?
With its acquisition of DoubleClick finally secure, Google gets down to the more controversial part of not being evil: axing a shit-ton of jobs.
As of today Google started making with the mass lay-offs. The New York Times says it's possible 300 could go, but the GOOG ain't all bad; it's softening the blow by giving a few chumps "transitional" roles, which means you get to transition-the-hell-out after the two big ships become one.
The movie American Pie made the term MILF famous. You hear it everywhere. Even where you shouldn't like in kid's movies. Somehow we don't think the same will happen with the term Shmmom or Smoking Hot Minivan Mom. Yea, we know. It's a mouthful. Leave it to a local car dealer to think up this crap.
This ad for Heng Yuan Xiang, a wool company, pisses China off. We thought it was just the mob overreacting again, but -- having watched about half of it -- we're suddenly jam-packed with repressed rage. A great way to destroy someone's soul would be to pin their eyelids open and force them to sit through this for a little over six minutes.
The spot starts about :09 into the video, so don't be fooled by all that happy baby stuff at the beginning. Here's a positive: after one sitting, you'll feel uncomfortably familiar with all the animals in the Chinese zodiac. AND you'll have three new syllables burned forever into your brain.
For all her noxious crying and whatnot, Hillary Clinton is a well-honed jungle predator. "Winning. Winning, winning, that's my measure of success -- winning," she barked recently.
Having demonstrated yesterday that she's still a viable contender for the presidency, the question arises: what does it take to win, win, win like Hillary?
Here's a picture from a recent PETA stunt at Covent Garden in London. (If you're wondering why it says "Moo," it's because it came from our favourite Hilton.) Campaign copy reads, "Unhappy Mother's Day for pigs! GO VEGETARIAN."
See Make the Logo Bigger exercise deductive logic: "Wouldn't momma pigs have a bad day every day?"
No need to be coherent when you've got a naked MILF on her knees in a cage. And BFD says the woman in the cage isn't just somebody's mom -- she's pregnant.
Ugh, PETA, uuuuuugh. You make us want to tear the shin off an antelope with our teeth.
The primaries for Ohio and Texas are fast approaching. Tensions are high between Hillary and Obama. Unless Hillary scores these last two states, she's pretty much ether.
So after Hillary went all Exorcist on Obama about some slanted flyers his campaign disseminated -- pretty normal fare in a political death match -- we were like, Okay, the girl has snapped. It's over.
Then this picture of Obama wearing Somali garb surfaces. And instead of going "Uh, yeah, Obama's dad was African -- is that a problem?", camp Obama goes apeshit and accuses camp Hillary of smearing their Fearless Leader in the last dregs of this doomed pissing contest.
- StrawberryFrog, The Wexley School for Girls, The Barbarian Group. Now we can add Omelet to the list of oddly named advertising companies.
- Hmm. It seems dumping its iconic bottle campaign was the right thing to do for Absolut which, last year, saw sales hit five millions cases, its highest ever.
- Rather than "Get some NYC Condom," Copyranter thinks New York's Department of Health condom campaign should, perhaps, read, "Get some wet, tight waxed pussy."