- Qualcomm announced the Handsolo today. It's waterproof, battery-free and has unlimited expandable memory. Also, you can wank off with it.
- Gmail Custom Time, which lets users send up to 10 emails to the past per year, debuted today. Wouldn't it be neat to get a drunken rant from Future You?
- Seriously, you should get paid to whore for friends on Facebook. Because come on. Two thousand friends? That's a few dozen impressions at least.
Last year Google turned your love life into an algorithmically solvable search problem. This year it's teamed up with Virgin to give us Virgle: the adventure of not one, but many lifetimes.
Apply to become a Virgle pioneer and you could win a coveted slot on a ship to Mars. It will be dangerous. It will be uncomfortable. It will be unnecessarily expensive. "But your enriched descendants will appreciate your sacrifice, which should render worthwhile your choice to spend the rest of your (perhaps radically foreshortened) life in deprivation and uncertainty," Virgle assures you.
Here's a Ryan Iverson parody of Dennis Hopper's Ameriprise ads -- which were creepy to begin with.
Seems like it was just a matter of time before this guy got spoofed. Something about his choice of sunglasses and the way he touches index finger to thumb while talking. Plus, he does kinda vibe like he wouldn't mind killing you.
Spoof meets the big-leagues in this trailer for Under the Same Moon, a Hispanic-American film with a title so sappy it could itself be a spoof.
The trailer pulls the sympathy card with child star Adrian Alonso while mocking Lou Dobbs, whom HuffPo dubbed "CNN's anti-immigrant crusader."
In what is clearly a joke or some sort of clandestine promotion for the next greatest social network or some other entity, ncludr.com (get it? includer?) has launched with snarky fanfare including claims it's "the most awesomest ultimate social network ever" with "international membership already in the billions."
Greenpeace has built a spoof site to take on Kleenex, which, since hankies went out of mode, dominates the wipe-your-eyes and blow-your-nose market.
The "Kleer-cut" site is a barbed duplicate of Kleenex's current "Let it Out" campaign, which encourages people to hit soggy emotional highs and head for the nearest floral tissue box. "Tell calm, cool and collected to TAKE A HIKE," it coaxes. "It's time to LAUGH until you CRY. SCREAM until you spit. Show your heart and show some tears."
Remember when the Elmo Song assassination brought out the inner-child-decimating sociopath in you? The Bessies can help fuel that sleeping fire. Also see their take on crappy multi-blade shaving spots.
Tagline: "Only good TV lives." Courtesy of John St., Toronto.
Yawn. Gratuitous media murder is so freshman year. Right up there with the UC Berkeley Putnam Porno. (Don't ask.)
To celebrate Easter, JerryTime, that goofy video series we discovered years ago, has put together a new video called Triumph of the Peeps which is a spoof of Leni Riefenstahl's famous Nazi propaganda film Triumph of the Will. In the video, Peeps replace Nazi soldiers and Arian youth.
We love a good throwback ad. To get a feel for how the past can put everyday brands in perspective, we give you "Love Quiz" ("...for married folks only!"), from the days when Lysol was -- wait for it! -- a douche.
But this post is about current products that have been given a dated spin, courtesy of Worth 1000 (thanks, Dario!). Take a guess on what product is behind:
o The color TV-compatible joy machine
o That envy-stirring Hollandaise easy-rider
o Sassy and scandalous women's outtakes -- with wonderful Cole Porter songs!
o How video games benefit your children
Imagine The Warriors took place in present-day Manhattan. But replace the vicious gangs with refugees from Flashdance.
Before you virtually bitchslap us and go, "Why would we EVER do that?!", be forewarned: somebody already has.
Can -- you -- dig -- it?
The client: MTV.