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Hardee's Wants You to Have Sex With Its Mega-Burger

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It's one thing to use a sexy, scantily clad woman to, by association, promote your mega-burger of the month. It's another thing entirely to liken the eating of that mega-burger to the eating...uh...spending intimate time with that sexy, scantily-clad woman. But that's what Hardee's is doing in its latest babe-on-a-burger commercial in which Patty counts down the ten steps of eating the burger like you were having sex with her. Sex with a woman, groovy. Sex with a burger, eeew.

by Steve Hall    May-24-07   Comments (1)    Bookmark and Share     
Topic: Bad, Commercials

UK Mac vs PC Ads Even Less Palatable than US Variations

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Update. We're not too keen on the UK variations on Apple's Mac vs PC campaign, but user comments suggest they're really rather awesome in a UK kind of way.

Guess you have to be there. On this side of the pond, however, the variations really make you appreciate the kind, if condescending, chemistry between Justin Long and that-other-guy.

The ads feature actors Mitchell and Webb of a sitcom called Peepshow, whose vibe can perhaps be most easily compared to Larry David's painfully awkward Curb Your Enthusiasm.

by Angela Natividad    May-23-07   Comments (3)    Bookmark and Share     
Topic: Bad, Brands, Campaigns, Commercials

Breast Cancer Radio Ads. Ho Hum

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John St. has just launched a campaign for Rethink Breast Cancer. The idea is to get you thinking about assumptions you make about shirts people wear and ultimately convince you it would be awesome to buy a breast cancer tee.

Radio spots by shirt type: Camouflage, Chinese symbol, Bride.

The ads do a decent job of helping you jump the proper cognitive hoops but overall we felt chafed by the processed vanilla yogurt feel. Sitting through this felt like Homestar Runner's Marzipan come to life and singing us one of her insufferable folk songs.

by Angela Natividad    May-21-07   Comments ()    Bookmark and Share     
Topic: Bad, Cause, Radio

Lynx Mynxes Select Ultimate Lynx Player Finalists

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Back in April, Lynx launched its Bom Chicka Wah Wah Rally flirting contest which asked guys to send in videos displaying their best flirting techniques. Well, the finalists have been selected by a team of Lynx Mynx Girls and you can view them here. It's no wonder most guys still can't get a date.

by Steve Hall    May-17-07   Comments (1)    Bookmark and Share     
Topic: Bad, Consumer Created, Good, Online, Video

Dance Responsibly, or the Vodka-Buzzed Dance Cops Will Get You

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Meet HI NRG, a vodka-based energy drink whose campaign site Dance Responsibly features three videos that have captured violations of our sensory rights.

Inspired by the self-policing "drink responsibly" sash alcohol brands are so fond of wearing, HI NRG claims to give you so much energy that it too must be had responsibly. Lest you diverge, the stern dance police will (you hope, we're sure) whip you back into shape.

And because it wouldn't be a legit marketing strategy without one, the site also features a CGM campaign for $3,000, almost a third lower than the going bedroom-dancing rate of $10,000, a figure that seems to fall out of CGM coffers like candy out of a big fat pinata.

Because neither the pleather-porting sex kitten cops nor the dance-themed campaign were enough of a back-decade rip-off, the drink had to call itself HI NRG too.

The campaign was put together by Kojo Interactive. We really can't think of a more devastating attempt to manifest the 90s. Wait, Alicia Silverstone just turned the corner.

by Angela Natividad    May-16-07   Comments ()    Bookmark and Share     
Topic: Bad, Campaigns, Online, Packaging

Theme Park No Place for Cock Jokes (Unless You're at Six Flags)

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Speaking of bad context, AdFreak observes an awkward instance for wood: at a theme park.

If you've seen Shrek, you know it's possible to incorporate raunchy grown-up giggles into apparently tame kid-fare without looking like a total asshat.

Six Flags Great Adventure in Jersey has yet to learn this subtle art, considering they erected a gigantor billboard for their big wooden El Toro ride upon which is writ "It's good to have wood" - right over the head of the perennially cheerful Bugs Bunny.

While they were at it, they might as well have gone all the way and made a cock-shaped roller coaster in the style of the French. Then El Toro would have been aptly named.

by Angela Natividad    May-15-07   Comments (1)    Bookmark and Share     
Topic: Bad, Outdoor

Britain's Royal Navy Delivers Message Sloooooowly

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We like gluelondon but we're not that impressed for their recent work done for Britain's Royal Navy recruitment efforts. Basically, it's a website that lets you send personalized video messages to your friends. Well, not all that personalized. From several videos of the Royal Navy doing their thing, one is chosen, the sender writes a message, chooses a name from a name list and then emails the thing to a friend or to the friends mobile.

Sadly, the site takes eons to load. It's one thing for a site to go through a slow pre-load which then results in a stellar experience but this site goes through a slew of very slow pre-loads, some of which stutteringly occur in the middle of the presentation which, itself, is far from stellar.

Targeted to 15-24 year olds, famous for their lack of attention span, we question how many will make it far enough through this site to actually click the Send button.

by Steve Hall    May-14-07   Comments (9)    Bookmark and Share     
Topic: Bad, Creative Commentary, Online, Social

Equinox Activates, Eggs Hatch, Brand Love is Stupid, Primetime Past Prime

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- Copyranter puts the overly wordy, overly aspirational Equinox gym in its place telling them their "Life=Activating Destiny" headline is a load of crap.

- Shawn has no idea what this "babes and boys in eggs" ad is all about. Neither do we.

- Cynopsis reports: "News Corp.'s Fox Sports and MySpace announced a sponsorship deal with the NFL that will give advertisers a broad web presence during the Super Bowl, a little added value for $2.7 million they'll have to spend next year for a thirty-second spot. Advertisers will be able to offer "calls to action" after their spots run online, according to The Wall Street Journal, with coupons and links to their own sites."

- In NBC upfront news, Friday Night Lights will return for a full season, the Bionic Woman makes a return, Chuck will be about a guy with a computer for a brain, Lipstick Jungle will follow the lives of three successful New York women, Journeyman will be about time travel and Life will be about a wrongfully convicted police officer who returns to work.

more »

by Steve Hall    May-11-07   Comments (1)    Bookmark and Share     
Topic: Bad, Brands, Super Bowl 2008

Draft/FCB Celebrates Glorification of Bad Ass Mofo Stereotype

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George Parker has the inside dope on Draft/FCB's excitement for the recent account win and work it did for the new Electronic Arts game, Def Jam Icon, yet another "Yo mutha fucka, you fuck with me, I beat the shit out of your sorry ass" cultural stereotype that makes one particular segment of people look like pea-brained idiots with nothing better to do than self-genocide themselves out of existence. In support of that stellar accomplishment and lauding the agency's teamwork, Draft/FCB's three top dudes, Howard, Jonathon and Lawrence, in an internal memo, blather platitudes such as "tearing down geographical silos, tapping into cross-office expertise and growing our business" and "working together seamlessly in our new agency model...as a result of a global creative rumble." This is the genius it took win the account and promote a game who's sole purpose is to let kids idolize bad ass mutha fuckas as some class of hero? Eesh. Be careful what you attach your internal memos to.

by Steve Hall    May-11-07   Comments (1)    Bookmark and Share     
Topic: Agencies, Bad, Commercials, Opinion, Trends and Culture

Drink This And You Will Pee Flames

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There's already enough horrific scenarios out there for men and their penises. We don't need yet another Bobbit, gallstone, STD or broken erection nightmare messing with our head (s). But some energy drink had to go and do it. Ow. Just ow.

We can't quite make out the brand of beverage here. For all we know it's just another spoof from some spiteful art director with penis envy.

by Steve Hall    May- 7-07   Comments ()    Bookmark and Share     
Topic: Bad

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