OK. We are WIDE awake this morning thanks to Primitive Shoes and import car model Justene Jaro who, bless her soul (body?), has awoken us in ways that are, well, just not fit for publication...even on Adrants. Anyway, filth out of the way, curvaceous cutie Justene Jaro is featured in a two minute promotional video for the 20-year-old Nike Air Max 90.
As if we were watching a long form beer commercial of old or some cheesy auto parts ad in the back of Hot Rod magazine, Jaro's bulbous breasts burst forth, spilling from above and below the confines of her revealing top as it struggles to contain her pendulous pulchritude. Clad only in lingerie..and sometimes ripped Daisy Dukes...Jaro frolicks about on a bed, on a couch and on a set of stairs while wearing, playing with and, yes, seductively licking a pair of Nike Air Max 90s.
Dita Von Teese, the American burlesque dancer who's loved by Europeans, is featured in a new video for Perrier. In the video, the dice are rolled and, depending upon the outcome, Dita will "strip" or lick her lips. It's all very PG-13 and YouTube acceptable. She finishes the video by bathing herself in Perrier, hardly as sexy as, say, milk or oil but, again, this is YouTube.
Said to have been inspired by 1940s-era Hollywood stars as Betty Grable and Bettie Page, Dita was once married to rocker Marilyn Manson.
Up in Calgary there's a bit of a furor over a billboard campaign promoting a new condo complex. At issue is the image and copy which consists of an almost upskirt shot of a woman in a miniskirt along with the words, "Look up... Way up."
The condo complex is being developed by ProCura which just finished restoring a sufragette home currently being used as a sales office for the new condo complex. Upon completion of the condo complex, ProCura has promised to turn the home into a community center for women's groups and a museum for the Famous 5, a group of Alberta women who fought for women's rights.
So...the complaint centers upon the disconnect between the work ProCura will do for women's groups and the campaign which some have labeled offensive.
28-year-old web designer Travis Gertz doesn't like the campaign. "My wife Rachel and I just got back from eight months travelling through the United States," he says. "The first thing I see when I get home is this offensive ad; it makes you embarrassed to be a Calgarian."
Well good morning! Nothing like some thong-clad ass to wake you up on a Monday morning. We can thank Copyranter for pointing us to this ass-in-your-face mirror shot of a few ladies making a pyramid. And American Apparel for continuing to perpetuate the acceptance of soft core porn in advertising.
Guess it's the most debauchery we can expect having not traveled to Cannes this year. Though, of course, we haven't heard the last from our Cannes Correspondent Angela Natividad yet. She could make this American Apparel ad look like a bunch of innocent school girls playing during recess. Oh wait, wrong analogy. Anyway...
You can interpret this Lynx commercial with Jessica Jane Clement in two different ways. First, the guy is just an absolute clueless idiot. Over and over, he kills his chances at having a continuing relationship with one of the hottest women in the world. And the fact he and his idiocy are even remotely associated with Lynx would cause one to avoid the product at all costs.
Second, they guy is still an absolute clueless idiot but so is every potential Lynx users because, according to this commercial, they have to be hit over the head again and again and again before they realize all they need to do is use Lynx to get one of the world's hottest women. Which, of course, is one of the most idiotic notions in the world.
Either way, the entire thing is an idiotic premise. Of course, that doesn't make it unfunny. Not at all.
Copyranter likes to call it AssCrackVertising. We just like to call it awesome. Any ad with a beautiful woman in a bikini...shot from from behind...or from the front...is a perfectly good ad in our book. So thank you, Hawaiian Tropic. Call it what you will, Copyranter, but we'll take bikini anytime we can get it.
Unless this video has an encoding problem, it looks like its creators didn't make the soundtrack long enough to match the video portion. But who really cares about that crap when the video gives us a detailed aftermath-style view of what was most certainly an amazing night of Axe-Style partying on a boat?
Thank God there are still countries out there that have no problem with their stewardesses (yes, not flight attendants) stripping down to their bikinis (because all stewardesses wear bikinis under their uniforms in these countries) to wash their airplanes. And, they don't even mind when the stewardesses' bikini-clad bodies become all soaped up like a good bikini car wash girl.
In 2008, a hot model rockin' out in lingerie and her underwear Risky Business-style was deemed too risque for TV. Would that hold true today in 2010? Watch this Guitar Hero ad with supermodel Marisa Miller and let us know.
Apparently, it aired in Britain to no fanfare. Is America still too puritanical? Or are we right to keep smoking hot models far, far away from the eyes of horny 14 year old boys?
Boobs. They'll sell anything. Excusing the oxymoronic ad-before-an-an idiocy of pre-roll video ads, this new effort from RGS, a Russian entity that...well, we have no idea what they do because we can't read their website and we're too lazy to use a translation service. But that's besides the point.
The only thing that matters here is boobs. Big boobs. Small boobs. Painted boobs. Crashing boobs. Yes, crashing. The boobs in this ad are bounced, fondled, handled and, well, tossed in every direction to illustrate, well, something about crashing motor vehicles.
It's certainly an interesting tactic for calling attention to...well, something. Yea, there's likely a double meaning on the word boob in there somewhere.