Leave it to Copyranter to find the raciest ads out there and leave it to Adrants to share them with you. While there are literally thousands of words (we learned many we'd never heard of while having dinner with the Fleshbot crew at SXSW) to describe that particular area between a woman's legs, "box" remains one of the most popular and one of the most goofed. So, it is without surprise, the headline next to a visual of 2007's Ms. Bikini Universe Marzia Prince with a box of body strength supplement Gaspari Nutrition in front of her, yes, box, reads, "The Most Sought After Box on the Planet."
What more can we say? Sometimes headlines just write themselves, don't they?
OK, OK, we'll cover it. Geez. Just because all everyone thinks we write about here are boobs and booty doesn't mean we're always going to cover the latest nudie film from Abercrombie & Fitch. But, since you beg, we aim to oblige so here it is in all it's NSFW glory.
We could comment on how it degrades human morality or how, conversely, it celebrates one of the most normal human states we know, nudity, but we're not going to burden you with endless pontification that would amount to nothing more than endless babble. Speaking of endless babble, have we reached our word count so this text will properly wrap around the ubiquitous (obligatory?) racy image we've included here for you?
Attempting to explain how a small tweak can make a better car, ATTIK has created a new commercial for the Scion tC. From a name change to a floor change to a telephone number change, perceptions can change quite a bit. Apparently, the small tweaks made to the Scion tC have made it a far different (better?) car.
We're just wondering how many people were distracted by that revealed pink bra at the end and missed the final shot of the commercial during which the car was shown thinking, "was that a car in that 1-900 ad?"
If there's any one company that's milking (yes, they did that too) the whole sex sells thing, it's PETA. With so many of their campaigns using sex as its primary means of attracting attention, one might assume the entire staff of PETA is a bunch of nymphomaniacs. That or they are so hard up for sex, their ad campaigns are their only form of release.
So here we have retired porn star Jenna Jameson dressing up in pleather to urge S&M lovers to loose their leather and don plastic instead. Sounds good to us. Plastic would seem to do a much better job than leather at containing all those messy fluids that often go along with wearing clothes like this.
VH1 Charm School participant Saaphyri (and her hefty breasts) are gratuitously front and center in a new video promoting her line of lip gloss called LipChap. In the video, Saaphyri slithers, coos and teases as the camera glides over her making sure every inch of her curvaceously bootylicious body is admired with the intensity of a 14 year old boy at a wet t-shirt contest.
We've written about ad network company Blulithium and its founder Gurbaksh Chahal several times before but we never thought we'd be telling you, according to ValleyWag, he's been buffing up his body by training with San Jose-based bodybuilder Tom Austin, star of several gay porn flicks such as Minute Man 24. But it all makes sense. You can't be a porn star unless you have a six pack, bulging chest, massive biceps and a bulging package to go along with all that super human manliness. Austin has all that. So it's just logical Austin would know how to buff up Chahal who has acting aspirations of his own.
K-What? I'm sorry, I know you want me to look at your logo and go visit your website but I just can't take my eyes of that figure of perfection lying on the tennis court as if she's channeling Christina Ricci in Black Snake Moan and wants it...NEEDS it really, really badly!
I've been locked away writing about advertising way too long. Had I known female tennis players dressed like this and teased the spectators between matches I'd have GIVEN Adrants away long ago and signed up to be a ball boy.
OK, so.....are we to believe that Beate Uhse condoms are so good (or is it bad?) they can help a guy last so long he'd get bored of all that intense thrusting and just start playing games of Sudoku or connect-the-dots on the stomach or back of his sex receptacle? And yea, if all the guy is doing is pounding into the girl while playing games on her then, yes, she is being treated as a sex receptacle. So are we also to believe Beate Uhse thinks that's all women are good for? WTF?
Copyranter loves (hates) Tom Ford ads. We do too. Sort of like the idiocy of Dolce and Gabanna ads, Tom Ford insist on foisting oddly sexual (but not really) imagery upon us in an effort to get us to somehow believe using his products will make our lives better. If getting our nuts violently grabbed by a naked woman with an expression that could kill is his idea of persuasion, it's doing a great job making us run in an entirely opposite direction.
Without fear of American political correctness or the nation's apparent refusal to accept men are, in fact, sexually attracted to women, we are thankful to have Che Magazine's continuing campaign which gleefully and without apology offers up women as objects of desire to increase circulation. Oh there's a joke in there somewhere but we're gonna leave that to you.
Created by Antwerp's Duval Guillaume, the ad envisions the ideal desk calendar for the man trudging, wearily, through his day when he'd rather be tossing everything off his desk and throwing that hottie down on it for some intense mid-afternoon tension relief. Come on, you know it's true. Just admit it.
See the ad in its full sized glory here.